WEBVTT
00:01:01.329 --> 00:01:02.562
There's no bell
00:01:02.564 --> 00:01:05.330
When you call for me
00:01:05.332 --> 00:01:08.401
You'll be falling for miles
00:01:09.503 --> 00:01:12.908
I'm bewitched by your misery
00:01:14.408 --> 00:01:17.977
But I love it when you smile
00:01:17.979 --> 00:01:20.915
Let me know
what you want from me
00:01:22.082 --> 00:01:25.851
Whisper "love" in my ears
00:01:25.853 --> 00:01:28.790
Before you try
to get your hooks in me
00:01:30.591 --> 00:01:34.860
I should warn you, my dear
00:01:34.862 --> 00:01:38.263
My heart is a haunted house
00:01:38.265 --> 00:01:42.200
Once you're in,
you ain't getting out
00:01:42.202 --> 00:01:46.238
It's the trap
you've been waiting for
00:01:46.240 --> 00:01:49.974
Ain't no windows,
ain't no doors
00:01:49.976 --> 00:01:53.115
No escaping the way you feel
00:01:54.749 --> 00:01:58.283
It's like a dream,
but you hope it's real
00:01:58.285 --> 00:02:02.155
My, my, my heart
00:02:02.157 --> 00:02:08.093
- M-m-m-my heart is a haunted
- Haunted house
00:02:09.997 --> 00:02:13.800
M-m-m-my heart is a haunted
00:02:13.802 --> 00:02:16.171
Haunted house
00:02:35.022 --> 00:02:36.754
My love.
00:02:36.756 --> 00:02:38.991
Cara mia.
00:02:38.993 --> 00:02:41.862
The ring! The ring!
Oh, no! No, no, no!
00:02:50.004 --> 00:02:53.341
Oh, Thing!
Best hand always has the ring!
00:03:03.384 --> 00:03:05.717
Dearly be-loathed,
00:03:05.719 --> 00:03:09.721
it is indeed a rare privilege
to see our family
00:03:09.723 --> 00:03:13.358
gathered together
for this Addams tradition.
00:03:13.360 --> 00:03:15.661
To commence this ceremony
00:03:15.663 --> 00:03:17.196
and deliver these two
00:03:17.198 --> 00:03:21.234
into the yawning void
of matrimony,
00:03:21.236 --> 00:03:25.874
we put the lime in the coconut
and drink them both up.
00:03:33.313 --> 00:03:35.547
I now pronounce you...
00:03:35.549 --> 00:03:36.916
- Monsters!
- Freaks!
00:03:36.918 --> 00:03:38.016
Get out, Addams!
00:03:38.018 --> 00:03:39.184
You've been here
long enough!
00:03:39.186 --> 00:03:40.887
We've had
enough of your kind!
00:03:40.889 --> 00:03:42.354
Addams aren't wanted here!
00:03:42.356 --> 00:03:43.822
Leave already!
00:03:43.824 --> 00:03:45.557
I now pronounce you
husband and wife.
00:03:45.559 --> 00:03:46.726
Quick, put the lime
in the coconut
00:03:46.728 --> 00:03:48.193
and drink 'em both up!
00:03:52.498 --> 00:03:54.432
Sorry, I couldn't help myself.
00:03:54.434 --> 00:03:55.836
This is our home!
00:03:56.871 --> 00:03:58.037
You're not wanted!
00:03:58.039 --> 00:03:59.238
We don't want you here!
00:03:59.240 --> 00:04:02.076
Everyone, to the bridge!
00:04:05.445 --> 00:04:06.611
Fire!
00:04:06.613 --> 00:04:07.782
Fire!
00:04:23.598 --> 00:04:25.764
You two love bats
better fly out of here!
00:04:25.766 --> 00:04:27.633
I'll hold them off!
00:04:27.635 --> 00:04:29.067
Mazurka!
00:04:32.606 --> 00:04:34.375
Grab onto my hairy hump!
00:04:39.813 --> 00:04:42.547
I think I can see
my house from here.
00:04:42.549 --> 00:04:45.217
Oh, no.
That's a women's prison.
00:04:45.219 --> 00:04:48.253
Oh, Gomez, why do hordes
of angry villagers
00:04:48.255 --> 00:04:49.821
follow us everywhere we go?
00:04:49.823 --> 00:04:53.424
We are safe, my love,
that is all that matters.
00:04:53.426 --> 00:04:55.260
I want to find a new home
00:04:55.262 --> 00:04:57.296
that is shrouded
from the world.
00:04:57.298 --> 00:05:00.299
Someplace that is truly us.
00:05:00.301 --> 00:05:04.001
Yes! Somewhere horrible!
Somewhere corrupt!
00:05:04.003 --> 00:05:06.237
Somewhere that no one
in their right mind
00:05:06.239 --> 00:05:08.008
would be caught dead in!
00:05:18.786 --> 00:05:20.518
Unhappy, darling?
00:05:20.520 --> 00:05:23.255
Yes, completely.
00:05:23.257 --> 00:05:26.592
Oh, Gomez,
you have torn down my walls
00:05:26.594 --> 00:05:29.294
and stabbed your name
onto my heart.
00:05:31.097 --> 00:05:33.131
My wan temptress,
00:05:33.133 --> 00:05:35.202
your hand is as cold
as a dead fish.
00:05:35.868 --> 00:05:38.804
My love, that is a dead fish.
00:05:38.806 --> 00:05:40.272
Mmm, mmm...
00:05:40.274 --> 00:05:41.543
So it is.
00:05:46.546 --> 00:05:48.046
Darling,
00:05:48.048 --> 00:05:51.850
is that a wrinkle
I see on your pallid brow?
00:05:51.852 --> 00:05:53.051
What's wrong?
00:05:53.053 --> 00:05:55.188
We can't run forever, my love.
00:05:55.190 --> 00:05:57.056
I want a home again.
00:05:57.058 --> 00:05:59.792
I want our children
to grow up in peace.
00:05:59.794 --> 00:06:02.294
I want to pick out
cemetery plots.
00:06:02.296 --> 00:06:06.231
Morticia, I swear on my life
I will find us a new home.
00:06:06.233 --> 00:06:08.503
And your every wish
shall be granted.
00:06:09.135 --> 00:06:10.736
Mon amour.
00:06:10.738 --> 00:06:15.073
French. You know
what that does to me.
00:06:16.544 --> 00:06:18.413
Wild thing
00:06:20.380 --> 00:06:21.648
You make my heart...
00:06:30.058 --> 00:06:31.926
We hit something!
00:06:39.666 --> 00:06:41.868
Is he all right?
00:06:41.870 --> 00:06:44.436
No, he seems
perfectly demented.
00:06:44.438 --> 00:06:48.407
"State Hospital for
the Criminally Insane."
00:06:48.409 --> 00:06:49.944
Gomez.
00:06:53.948 --> 00:06:55.679
That must be
the asylum.
00:06:55.681 --> 00:06:57.215
Oh, thank goodness.
00:06:57.217 --> 00:06:59.684
A decent place
to sleep for the night.
00:07:04.424 --> 00:07:05.426
Hmm?
00:07:06.294 --> 00:07:08.695
Thank you, old boy.
Lead the way.
00:07:26.479 --> 00:07:29.080
It's quiet. Too quiet.
00:07:29.082 --> 00:07:30.652
Must be the off-season.
00:07:39.661 --> 00:07:40.728
Hello?
00:07:44.799 --> 00:07:46.164
There's no one here.
00:07:46.166 --> 00:07:48.400
Could it be abandoned?
00:07:48.402 --> 00:07:51.135
It's creepy. Kooky.
00:07:51.137 --> 00:07:54.075
Mysterious. Spooky.
00:08:04.017 --> 00:08:05.486
Huh?
00:08:51.832 --> 00:08:56.037
Get out!
00:08:57.704 --> 00:08:59.071
It's hideous.
00:08:59.073 --> 00:09:00.574
It's horrible.
00:09:01.208 --> 00:09:03.307
It's home.
00:10:47.414 --> 00:10:50.351
What a lovely morning!
00:10:53.319 --> 00:10:54.485
Nice try.
00:10:54.487 --> 00:10:58.322
Get out!
00:10:58.324 --> 00:11:01.628
Oh, you're always so grumpy
before your morning coffee.
00:11:10.837 --> 00:11:11.970
Better?
00:11:29.856 --> 00:11:30.955
Lurch,
00:11:30.957 --> 00:11:32.125
it's time for breakfast.
00:11:50.812 --> 00:11:52.844
Thing.
00:11:52.846 --> 00:11:55.650
Have Ichabod
wake the children.
00:11:58.752 --> 00:12:01.552
Lurch, would you mind
dusting the house?
00:12:01.554 --> 00:12:02.856
Mmm.
00:12:10.930 --> 00:12:12.830
Slowly, Cleopatra.
00:12:12.832 --> 00:12:15.736
I wouldn't want my favorite
African Strangler to choke.
00:12:57.712 --> 00:13:00.778
All right, Ichabod. I'm awake.
00:13:00.780 --> 00:13:02.717
Not for long.
00:13:03.951 --> 00:13:05.749
Real mature, Pugsley.
00:13:05.751 --> 00:13:07.119
Oh, please.
00:13:07.121 --> 00:13:09.321
You never threw an axe
when you were my age?
00:13:09.323 --> 00:13:13.093
Of course I did.
I never missed.
00:13:15.563 --> 00:13:17.262
How I wish something
would liven up
00:13:17.264 --> 00:13:19.064
this already tedious day.
00:13:23.236 --> 00:13:24.771
Thanks for trying, Ichabod.
00:13:45.525 --> 00:13:46.760
Hmm.
00:14:12.653 --> 00:14:13.784
Pugsley?
00:14:13.786 --> 00:14:17.321
Pugsley! It's time
for sword practice.
00:14:17.323 --> 00:14:18.956
Pugsley!
00:14:18.958 --> 00:14:20.627
Let the games begin.
00:14:48.154 --> 00:14:51.058
Here's Pugsley!
00:15:07.874 --> 00:15:10.378
All right, son.
That's enough.
00:15:11.944 --> 00:15:14.748
They blow up
so fast these days.
00:15:25.458 --> 00:15:27.627
Don't make me come up there!
00:15:34.068 --> 00:15:35.803
This is your last warning!
00:15:48.215 --> 00:15:50.983
My head. Ow, ow, ow.
00:15:50.985 --> 00:15:54.418
Pugsley, we're supposed to be
working on your swordplay.
00:15:54.420 --> 00:15:56.622
Your Sabre Mazurka
is two weeks away,
00:15:56.624 --> 00:15:58.623
and you've barely
practiced at all.
00:15:58.625 --> 00:16:00.825
So I missed one practice.
What's the big deal?
00:16:00.827 --> 00:16:02.761
The big deal?
00:16:02.763 --> 00:16:05.397
The Sabre Mazurka
is the most important day
00:16:05.399 --> 00:16:06.663
in a young man's life.
00:16:06.665 --> 00:16:08.167
It's what makes you an Addams.
00:16:08.169 --> 00:16:11.268
It's the day your entire
family gathers around you
00:16:11.270 --> 00:16:14.772
and passes judgment on
your worth as a human being.
00:16:14.774 --> 00:16:16.273
I hear it's like Thanksgiving.
00:16:16.275 --> 00:16:19.243
But swords
are so old-fashioned.
00:16:19.245 --> 00:16:21.113
I'm more of a demolitions man.
00:16:21.115 --> 00:16:25.653
Explosives have no place
in a Mazurka. Hand them over.
00:16:29.122 --> 00:16:31.156
All of them.
00:16:31.158 --> 00:16:33.157
And the TNT.
00:16:33.159 --> 00:16:34.960
And the M-80s.
00:16:34.962 --> 00:16:38.363
Roman candles. Bang snaps.
Holy Hand Grenades.
00:16:39.832 --> 00:16:44.536
Son, our family hasn't been
all together in 13 years.
00:16:44.538 --> 00:16:46.638
They are coming
from all over the world
00:16:46.640 --> 00:16:48.974
to see you
on your special day.
00:16:48.976 --> 00:16:51.011
I just want it
to go perfectly.
00:16:51.977 --> 00:16:53.979
All right, Pop.
I'll practice.
00:16:53.981 --> 00:16:55.513
That's my boy.
00:17:01.054 --> 00:17:03.287
Putrid.
00:17:03.289 --> 00:17:04.690
Mmm. Horrifying.
00:17:04.692 --> 00:17:06.060
I call spleen.
00:17:08.495 --> 00:17:09.694
Mmm...
00:17:09.696 --> 00:17:11.162
- Ah, ow...
- Wednesday.
00:17:11.164 --> 00:17:12.830
Please, no ink stains
on the table.
00:17:12.832 --> 00:17:14.733
Yes, Mother.
00:17:18.471 --> 00:17:20.205
Gomez, everyone we've invited
00:17:20.207 --> 00:17:21.906
to the Mazurka
has threatened to come.
00:17:21.908 --> 00:17:24.808
I know. Isn't it wonderful?
00:17:25.913 --> 00:17:29.147
All Addamses
under one roof again.
00:17:29.149 --> 00:17:30.916
Yes, but where will
everyone sleep?
00:17:30.918 --> 00:17:33.350
We'll have Lurch fix up
the mausoleum.
00:17:33.352 --> 00:17:34.852
It'll be like
sleepaway camp.
00:17:36.122 --> 00:17:38.389
Very well, darling.
00:17:41.896 --> 00:17:43.194
Uncle Fester!
00:17:43.196 --> 00:17:44.862
Brother!
00:17:47.935 --> 00:17:49.234
Don't worry, I'm okay.
00:17:49.236 --> 00:17:51.336
The plate glass window
broke my fall.
00:17:51.338 --> 00:17:53.737
Ha! Ha!
00:17:53.739 --> 00:17:55.573
Rick'em,
rack'em, roar'em, buzz
00:17:55.575 --> 00:17:57.542
Addams is as Addams does
00:18:00.080 --> 00:18:02.214
I am thrilled you're here!
00:18:03.551 --> 00:18:04.949
I'm not late, am I?
00:18:04.951 --> 00:18:07.651
Actually, we weren't expecting
you for another two weeks.
00:18:07.653 --> 00:18:09.521
Huh. So, not late.
00:18:09.523 --> 00:18:11.055
I apologize, darling.
00:18:11.057 --> 00:18:13.124
You see,
I asked Fester to come early
00:18:13.126 --> 00:18:15.627
to help Pugsley
with his Mazurka practice.
00:18:15.629 --> 00:18:17.395
Hey!
00:18:17.397 --> 00:18:18.463
No! No!
00:18:18.465 --> 00:18:20.764
Bad Kitty!
That's a bad Kitty!
00:18:20.766 --> 00:18:22.032
If I'd known you were coming,
00:18:22.034 --> 00:18:23.801
I would have prepared
the dungeon.
00:18:23.803 --> 00:18:26.704
Please, don't worry.
I'll sleep in the attic.
00:18:26.706 --> 00:18:28.438
You won't even know I'm here.
00:18:28.440 --> 00:18:32.744
I've practiced that move
in a lot of people's homes.
00:18:32.746 --> 00:18:35.213
Uncle,
00:18:35.215 --> 00:18:37.682
can you tell us
what's beyond the gate?
00:18:40.586 --> 00:18:43.054
Why ever would you
ask that, dear?
00:18:43.056 --> 00:18:45.523
I heard a strange noise
in the fog earlier,
00:18:45.525 --> 00:18:47.157
and I should like
to investigate.
00:18:47.159 --> 00:18:49.327
There's nothing out there
but boring marshland.
00:18:49.329 --> 00:18:52.597
There must be something.
We never go anywhere.
00:18:52.599 --> 00:18:55.332
Who knows the untold horrors
we're missing out on.
00:18:55.334 --> 00:18:57.269
Darling,
we have all the horror
00:18:57.271 --> 00:18:58.436
we need, right here.
00:18:58.438 --> 00:19:01.472
Uncle Fester can go
wherever he likes.
00:19:01.474 --> 00:19:03.375
Now, now,
there are some restrictions.
00:19:03.377 --> 00:19:05.444
You know,
I can't go to the mall,
00:19:05.446 --> 00:19:07.512
or a zoo, or a building...
00:19:07.514 --> 00:19:08.612
When you're older,
00:19:08.614 --> 00:19:10.314
you can travel
to your heart's content.
00:19:10.316 --> 00:19:13.120
But for now,
it's safer for you here.
00:19:15.022 --> 00:19:16.524
Socrates, come.
00:19:18.191 --> 00:19:20.657
...South America,
Europe, China,
00:19:20.659 --> 00:19:23.360
Asia, most parts of Africa.
00:19:23.362 --> 00:19:25.332
I'm allowed in Antarctica!
00:19:38.445 --> 00:19:39.677
You're watching
00:19:39.679 --> 00:19:41.948
Home, Art
and Garden television.
00:19:43.850 --> 00:19:46.818
The world's a big place,
full of poor souls
00:19:46.820 --> 00:19:49.853
who don't know the difference
between shiplap and Shinola.
00:19:49.855 --> 00:19:51.455
Well, I'm here to help.
00:19:52.959 --> 00:19:56.060
I take your
uninspired living space
00:19:56.062 --> 00:19:59.129
and turn it into the perfect
palace of your dreams.
00:19:59.131 --> 00:20:02.902
No matter how outdated your
design sense, I can help you.
00:20:03.669 --> 00:20:05.203
My only flaw?
00:20:05.205 --> 00:20:07.171
Sometimes I care too much.
00:20:08.342 --> 00:20:10.308
I'm Margaux Needler,
00:20:10.310 --> 00:20:14.212
and I'm about to stage
a Design Intervention!
00:20:14.214 --> 00:20:16.580
You're welcome in advance.
00:20:16.582 --> 00:20:18.550
Today, we're putting
the finishing touches
00:20:18.552 --> 00:20:20.718
on our biggest project yet.
00:20:20.720 --> 00:20:22.387
Assimilation.
00:20:22.389 --> 00:20:24.421
We didn't just
make over a house.
00:20:24.423 --> 00:20:27.360
We made over a whole town!
00:20:28.428 --> 00:20:30.895
And in just two weeks,
on our live season finale,
00:20:30.897 --> 00:20:32.030
you will be able to buy
00:20:32.032 --> 00:20:33.599
your very own
piece of Assimilation.
00:20:33.601 --> 00:20:34.698
That's right!
00:20:34.700 --> 00:20:36.734
In a Design Intervention
first,
00:20:36.736 --> 00:20:40.204
we are putting a whole
neighborhood up for sale.
00:20:40.206 --> 00:20:42.005
This will be
your chance to purchase
00:20:42.007 --> 00:20:43.140
the house of your dreams
00:20:43.142 --> 00:20:45.275
in the town of your dreams!
00:20:45.277 --> 00:20:47.512
Sounds good?
I thought so.
00:20:47.514 --> 00:20:50.014
Welcome to Assimilation,
neighbor.
00:20:51.217 --> 00:20:52.550
This program
brought to you
00:20:52.552 --> 00:20:53.618
by Neighborhood Peeps.
00:20:53.620 --> 00:20:56.023
Your neighbors are watching!
00:20:56.922 --> 00:20:58.191
And, we're out!
00:20:59.191 --> 00:21:00.625
Love it. Perfect.
00:21:00.627 --> 00:21:02.494
Let's set up
for the walk-through.
00:21:02.496 --> 00:21:03.828
Margaux,
did that feel good to you?
00:21:03.830 --> 00:21:04.928
No, Glenn.
00:21:04.930 --> 00:21:07.299
We need more balloons,
more confetti.
00:21:07.301 --> 00:21:09.367
- Roger that.
- What are we selling here?
00:21:09.369 --> 00:21:12.436
Big dreams. You know
how you get big dreams?
00:21:12.438 --> 00:21:13.804
- Uh...
- With big ratings.
00:21:13.806 --> 00:21:15.072
- Got it.
- Double the balloons.
00:21:15.074 --> 00:21:16.907
And I want
a blizzard of confetti.
00:21:16.909 --> 00:21:18.475
I want so much confetti
that we need
00:21:18.477 --> 00:21:20.611
snow patrols
to find lost children.
00:21:20.613 --> 00:21:22.914
I bet my home improvement
empire on this town.
00:21:22.916 --> 00:21:24.381
Every house must sell
00:21:24.383 --> 00:21:25.715
or we're out of business!
00:21:25.717 --> 00:21:27.918
- It's got to be perfect!
- Mom!
00:21:27.920 --> 00:21:29.654
You're never
gonna believe this.
00:21:29.656 --> 00:21:30.754
What is it, Parker?
00:21:30.756 --> 00:21:33.558
I found a creepy mansion
up on the hill!
00:21:33.560 --> 00:21:34.992
I'm so glad you're exploring,
Parker,
00:21:34.994 --> 00:21:36.962
but I don't have time
to talk right now, sweetheart.
00:21:36.964 --> 00:21:38.596
Mama needs to help people.
00:21:38.598 --> 00:21:41.064
I need help.
Aren't I people?
00:21:41.066 --> 00:21:42.833
Oh, you're cute.
00:21:42.835 --> 00:21:44.836
Don't you have Chipper 'N'
Cheer practice this afternoon?
00:21:44.838 --> 00:21:46.138
Run along, honey.
00:21:46.140 --> 00:21:47.938
Now, Glenn, what are
the numbers we're expecting?
00:21:47.940 --> 00:21:49.340
- Well, if you look here...
- Mom!
00:21:50.643 --> 00:21:51.644
Ugh!
00:22:01.254 --> 00:22:03.524
Left a bit. Up a bit.
00:22:03.957 --> 00:22:06.090
Now, down a bit.
00:22:06.092 --> 00:22:08.495
Perfect.
00:22:09.329 --> 00:22:13.130
And three, two, one...
00:22:18.037 --> 00:22:20.472
You made me miss!
00:22:20.474 --> 00:22:23.942
Do you know how long
it took for me to set this up?
00:22:23.944 --> 00:22:25.842
Look, Pugsley...
00:22:25.844 --> 00:22:29.847
Your Mazurka's coming up,
and, well, you're not ready.
00:22:29.849 --> 00:22:32.516
Even if I am the only one
who sees it.
00:22:32.518 --> 00:22:34.552
So, pay attention,
00:22:34.554 --> 00:22:36.021
and you might actually
get through this.
00:22:36.023 --> 00:22:37.024
Wait.
00:22:37.724 --> 00:22:40.226
You're going to help me?
00:22:40.893 --> 00:22:41.993
Why?
00:22:41.995 --> 00:22:44.628
Because you are my brother.
00:22:44.630 --> 00:22:49.032
And... I love you.
00:22:54.040 --> 00:22:56.206
All right.
How are you gonna help me?
00:22:56.208 --> 00:22:58.209
You see that hole over there?
00:22:58.211 --> 00:22:59.679
Go stand beside it.
00:23:00.813 --> 00:23:02.546
Uh... That hole?
00:23:02.548 --> 00:23:03.982
That hole.
00:23:03.984 --> 00:23:05.884
Mmm...
I don't get it.
00:23:09.555 --> 00:23:10.890
Whoa.
00:23:22.468 --> 00:23:24.702
Darling, not to criticize,
00:23:24.704 --> 00:23:27.038
but is that really
as tight as you can make it?
00:23:27.040 --> 00:23:28.872
I'm sorry, Gomez.
00:23:28.874 --> 00:23:31.908
I'm just a bit preoccupied
with the Mazurka preparations.
00:23:31.910 --> 00:23:34.512
Oh, I am as well!
00:23:34.514 --> 00:23:36.981
I fear Pugsley
is overconfident
00:23:36.983 --> 00:23:39.016
and doesn't truly understand
00:23:39.018 --> 00:23:41.619
the importance
of this tradition.
00:23:41.621 --> 00:23:43.620
Good news, everybody.
Pugsley's gone.
00:23:43.622 --> 00:23:45.889
Wednesday,
I know that tone of voice.
00:23:45.891 --> 00:23:48.091
Dig up your brother. At once.
00:23:48.093 --> 00:23:49.726
You're weakening
the gene pool.
00:23:49.728 --> 00:23:51.094
Hold on.
00:23:51.096 --> 00:23:52.263
What do you have there?
00:23:52.265 --> 00:23:55.466
I'm not sure.
I like it.
00:23:55.468 --> 00:23:59.803
It's so... What's the word?
The opposite of sad?
00:23:59.805 --> 00:24:01.607
Darling, bring that to me.
00:24:04.611 --> 00:24:07.978
Strange, there's usually
a murderous clown
00:24:07.980 --> 00:24:10.214
attached to the other
end of these.
00:24:10.216 --> 00:24:13.083
Wednesday, don't move!
00:24:13.085 --> 00:24:18.222
What, in the name of
all that is unholy, is that?
00:24:18.224 --> 00:24:21.391
It tastes like cotton candy.
00:24:21.393 --> 00:24:23.293
How do you know
what cotton candy tastes like?
00:24:23.295 --> 00:24:25.763
Tish, it was my youth.
I made mistakes.
00:24:25.765 --> 00:24:28.465
Wednesday, wherever did
this pink thing come from?
00:24:28.467 --> 00:24:29.833
Outside.
00:24:29.835 --> 00:24:32.139
They're everywhere.
00:24:38.945 --> 00:24:42.346
Strangest weather
system I've ever seen.
00:24:48.188 --> 00:24:51.356
What is that?
Where's it coming from?
00:24:51.358 --> 00:24:52.756
Wait, wait, wait.
00:24:52.758 --> 00:24:55.292
The fog, it's lifting.
00:24:55.294 --> 00:24:57.028
Well, that would
only happen if...
00:24:57.030 --> 00:25:00.701
Someone drained the marsh.
But who?
00:25:03.336 --> 00:25:06.137
A town.
This is not good.
00:25:06.139 --> 00:25:07.371
We must go down there
00:25:07.373 --> 00:25:09.273
and introduce ourselves
at once.
00:25:09.275 --> 00:25:13.045
This day is becoming
most wonderfully disruptive.
00:25:26.458 --> 00:25:28.792
Let's keep going
with the run-through, okay?
00:25:28.794 --> 00:25:29.894
Welcome back.
00:25:29.896 --> 00:25:31.696
I'm so delighted
to show you my house.
00:25:31.698 --> 00:25:34.732
You can own one just like it,
just less large.
00:25:34.734 --> 00:25:37.635
Blah, blah, blah.
Sconces, crown molding.
00:25:37.637 --> 00:25:40.871
Which leads us to what I call
the Salon de Grandé.
00:25:40.873 --> 00:25:43.774
Cross here, turn,
and then say something like,
00:25:43.776 --> 00:25:45.743
"Now, before I show you
this view,
00:25:45.745 --> 00:25:47.378
"go to an antique store,
00:25:47.380 --> 00:25:49.981
"buy a chair,
and reupholster it.
00:25:49.983 --> 00:25:51.919
"'Cause you're gonna
wanna sit down for this."
00:25:54.853 --> 00:25:56.454
What? What's the matter?
00:25:56.456 --> 00:25:58.222
For heaven's sake,
what's going on?
00:25:58.224 --> 00:26:00.994
Do I have something
in my teeth? What is it?
00:26:10.370 --> 00:26:11.569
Not a single gargoyle.
00:26:11.571 --> 00:26:13.772
Maybe this isn't
such a bad thing.
00:26:13.774 --> 00:26:15.874
We have been
isolated here for a while.
00:26:15.876 --> 00:26:18.512
I could really
see myself dying here.
00:26:20.714 --> 00:26:22.080
Play nice, Kitty.
00:26:23.216 --> 00:26:25.183
Well, no one is running at us
00:26:25.185 --> 00:26:28.619
with torches and pitchforks,
so that's a plus.
00:26:28.621 --> 00:26:31.156
You know, darling,
I don't think we'll need
00:26:31.158 --> 00:26:32.924
to put the family
in the mausoleum.
00:26:32.926 --> 00:26:34.457
They can stay here!
00:26:34.459 --> 00:26:36.695
The family
would never be comfortable.
00:26:36.697 --> 00:26:37.794
It will be years
00:26:37.796 --> 00:26:39.798
before rust and decay set in.
00:26:39.800 --> 00:26:41.031
How you doing?
00:26:41.033 --> 00:26:43.303
It's all so... different.
00:26:44.771 --> 00:26:46.937
Pugsley, don't drink it all.
00:26:46.939 --> 00:26:49.573
This gentleman
wants some, too.
00:26:49.575 --> 00:26:51.408
Sir, it's all right.
00:26:51.410 --> 00:26:53.311
He's had all his shots!
00:26:53.313 --> 00:26:54.811
What a nervous man.
00:26:54.813 --> 00:26:57.815
Come on, Tish, let's
explore the neighborhood.
00:26:57.817 --> 00:26:59.483
I'm gonna pop in here
for two minutes
00:26:59.485 --> 00:27:01.985
and I'll meet you in
the town square. Agreed?
00:27:01.987 --> 00:27:03.090
Very well, darling.
00:27:03.989 --> 00:27:06.224
Good day, all.
00:27:07.494 --> 00:27:10.060
Don't let me interrupt
your cup of joe
00:27:10.062 --> 00:27:12.464
or whoever you have in there.
00:27:12.466 --> 00:27:16.934
So, what's dark and bitter
here other than yours truly?
00:27:16.936 --> 00:27:20.605
We have the
Madagascar Emerald Peaberry,
00:27:20.607 --> 00:27:22.106
in a summer patchouli roast.
00:27:22.108 --> 00:27:26.343
It has notes of oak,
cherry, and yoga.
00:27:26.345 --> 00:27:31.182
Hmm. You know, I'm looking
for something a bit stronger.
00:27:31.184 --> 00:27:32.853
Ah! Let me try that.
00:27:37.489 --> 00:27:40.124
Mmm! Morticia, you have
to try these coffee grounds.
00:27:40.126 --> 00:27:41.658
They have a wonderful grit!
00:27:41.660 --> 00:27:44.028
Just a moment,
what am I hearing?
00:27:45.431 --> 00:27:46.863
This is where
we all belong, yeah
00:27:46.865 --> 00:27:48.432
Everybody come together
00:27:48.434 --> 00:27:51.770
Sing our song, sing our song
00:27:51.772 --> 00:27:55.673
Life is really perfect
We are one big family, yeah
00:27:55.675 --> 00:27:57.340
Everything is so much better
00:27:57.342 --> 00:27:59.446
When I'm like you
and you're like me
00:28:00.447 --> 00:28:04.282
What's so great
about being yourself
00:28:04.284 --> 00:28:07.151
When you can be
like everyone else?
00:28:07.153 --> 00:28:11.488
Wow, that is
absolutely horrible!
00:28:11.490 --> 00:28:15.326
It's easy to be happy
when you have no choice
00:28:15.328 --> 00:28:18.696
Yes, it's easy to be happy
when you have no choice
00:28:18.698 --> 00:28:20.798
Hold on,
unless I miss my guess here,
00:28:20.800 --> 00:28:23.701
I believe that is
supposed to be music.
00:28:23.703 --> 00:28:24.869
They're greeting us with
00:28:24.871 --> 00:28:26.303
one of their
traditional songs.
00:28:26.305 --> 00:28:27.870
Well, then,
we ought to do the same.
00:28:27.872 --> 00:28:30.140
Wonderful idea, Fester.
00:28:30.142 --> 00:28:32.243
Isn't it great
when we are all together?
00:28:32.245 --> 00:28:36.180
Say it again
until you believe it
00:28:36.182 --> 00:28:38.215
I believe it
00:28:38.217 --> 00:28:39.652
We believe it
00:28:43.823 --> 00:28:45.555
I'd tip my hat to you
00:28:45.557 --> 00:28:47.891
I'd do just that
00:28:47.893 --> 00:28:50.395
Take it right off for you,
But I haven't got a hat
00:28:51.931 --> 00:28:54.631
I'm just a college boy,
even at that
00:28:55.768 --> 00:28:58.502
I'd tip my hat to you
But I haven't got a hat
00:29:05.444 --> 00:29:07.276
What? What'd I do?
00:29:07.278 --> 00:29:08.579
How rude.
00:29:08.581 --> 00:29:10.880
Gomez, we should return home.
00:29:10.882 --> 00:29:13.951
Morticia,
this is not the old country.
00:29:13.953 --> 00:29:16.454
True, these people
are a little different.
00:29:16.456 --> 00:29:18.589
But deep down,
we're all the same.
00:29:19.758 --> 00:29:22.126
We have to give them a chance.
Get to know them.
00:29:22.128 --> 00:29:23.695
We have to win them over.
00:29:23.697 --> 00:29:25.398
"Win them over"?
00:29:26.131 --> 00:29:28.067
Well, good morning, neighbor!
00:29:28.567 --> 00:29:30.067
Margaux Needler.
00:29:30.069 --> 00:29:33.404
Gomez Addams.
At your service.
00:29:33.406 --> 00:29:34.772
My wife, Morticia.
00:29:34.774 --> 00:29:35.906
Charmed.
00:29:35.908 --> 00:29:39.109
Our children,
Wednesday, Pugsley.
00:29:39.111 --> 00:29:40.744
And my brother, Fester.
00:29:40.746 --> 00:29:41.878
Hey, neighbor!
00:29:41.880 --> 00:29:44.080
You know, we can see
right into your windows?
00:29:44.082 --> 00:29:47.417
Nice to, uh, meet you.
00:29:47.419 --> 00:29:50.119
As your neighbor,
I'd like to offer you
00:29:50.121 --> 00:29:52.223
the opportunity of a lifetime.
00:29:52.225 --> 00:29:54.492
How'd you like
a free home makeover
00:29:54.494 --> 00:29:57.160
from a world-renowned
interior designer?
00:29:57.162 --> 00:29:58.494
It will be a challenge,
00:29:58.496 --> 00:30:00.965
but I can beautify that
old house of yours so fast,
00:30:00.967 --> 00:30:02.199
it'll make your head spin.
00:30:02.201 --> 00:30:03.301
I don't wanna brag,
00:30:03.303 --> 00:30:04.935
but mine already does that.
Look.
00:30:07.473 --> 00:30:10.640
I should like to see what this
plastic woman has to offer.
00:30:10.642 --> 00:30:13.644
Yes, well... When is
a good time to stop by?
00:30:13.646 --> 00:30:16.446
Actually, Ms. Needler...
00:30:16.448 --> 00:30:18.448
Darling...
00:30:18.450 --> 00:30:21.285
Stop by anytime you'd like.
00:30:21.287 --> 00:30:23.486
Oh, wonderful!
Then it's settled.
00:30:23.488 --> 00:30:25.822
I'll see you at your house,
first thing tomorrow.
00:30:25.824 --> 00:30:29.426
You're welcome in advance! Ta!
00:30:31.363 --> 00:30:33.496
That woman seems deranged.
00:30:33.498 --> 00:30:35.631
Her face reminds me
of a death mask.
00:30:35.633 --> 00:30:38.002
"Deranged"? "Death mask"?
00:30:38.004 --> 00:30:40.204
You tell me
she's got halitosis,
00:30:40.206 --> 00:30:41.942
and I'm hearing wedding bells!
00:30:54.152 --> 00:30:59.223
Pugsley, this is
the Addams family saber.
00:30:59.225 --> 00:31:02.025
300 years of Addams
00:31:02.027 --> 00:31:05.130
have danced the Mazurka
with this blade.
00:31:05.797 --> 00:31:06.898
Uh-uh.
00:31:06.900 --> 00:31:09.500
Only when
you've shown me you're ready.
00:31:09.502 --> 00:31:15.039
Your father was the greatest
swordsman in Addams history.
00:31:15.041 --> 00:31:18.309
His Mazurka
was the stuff of legends.
00:31:18.311 --> 00:31:21.078
So no pressure!
00:31:21.080 --> 00:31:24.580
It's all right here,
in the Mazurka handbook.
00:31:24.582 --> 00:31:28.051
Every Addams performs
this rite of passage
00:31:28.053 --> 00:31:31.421
to show that you're prepared
to defend your family.
00:31:31.423 --> 00:31:34.759
It sounds easy,
but believe me, it's insane!
00:31:34.761 --> 00:31:35.926
Fester, hand him
00:31:35.928 --> 00:31:37.863
the goo-goo-ga-ga
baby training sword.
00:31:38.663 --> 00:31:40.531
Pop?
00:31:40.533 --> 00:31:43.301
Has anyone
ever failed the Mazurka?
00:31:43.303 --> 00:31:45.235
Once.
Your third cousin, Xander.
00:31:45.237 --> 00:31:46.436
Never heard of him.
00:31:46.438 --> 00:31:47.871
Exactly.
00:31:47.873 --> 00:31:48.939
Music!
00:31:50.376 --> 00:31:51.841
There's someone at the door.
00:31:51.843 --> 00:31:55.446
Hi, guys. I'm going up
to this creepy mansion.
00:31:55.448 --> 00:31:58.418
If you don't hear from me
in 30 minutes, send backup.
00:32:04.823 --> 00:32:09.062
You rang?
00:32:14.065 --> 00:32:15.299
Yeah, no.
00:32:15.301 --> 00:32:17.201
Life's too short. See ya!
00:32:23.743 --> 00:32:25.074
Oh!
00:32:25.076 --> 00:32:27.578
Good morning, Kitty.
00:32:27.580 --> 00:32:29.249
Greetings, Ms. Needler.
00:32:32.451 --> 00:32:34.217
Wow.
00:32:34.219 --> 00:32:37.620
Good morning!
I hope this isn't a bad time.
00:32:37.622 --> 00:32:39.622
The worst. Do come in.
00:32:39.624 --> 00:32:40.724
Glenn?
00:32:44.263 --> 00:32:46.129
Welcome to the neighborhood.
00:32:46.131 --> 00:32:47.499
Thank you.
00:32:49.368 --> 00:32:51.502
Oh, my! Hmm.
00:32:51.504 --> 00:32:53.670
Are you ready
for your Margaux makeover?
00:32:53.672 --> 00:32:54.804
Quite.
00:32:54.806 --> 00:32:58.274
Pugsley's been climbing
the walls in anticipation.
00:33:02.415 --> 00:33:04.017
Well, well, well!
00:33:05.150 --> 00:33:06.817
Let's take a look around,
shall we?
00:33:06.819 --> 00:33:09.122
And before you say anything,
you're welcome.
00:33:10.156 --> 00:33:14.091
Now, if we're trying for
a more contemporary look,
00:33:14.093 --> 00:33:16.694
well, these sconces
have to go.
00:33:19.165 --> 00:33:21.764
The sconces were a gift
from dead relatives.
00:33:21.766 --> 00:33:22.966
If we get rid of them,
00:33:22.968 --> 00:33:25.938
they'll be terribly hurt
the next time they visit.
00:33:27.805 --> 00:33:30.340
And this is our whine cellar.
00:33:30.342 --> 00:33:33.343
We have a lovely
collection of whines.
00:33:33.345 --> 00:33:34.878
- Are we there yet?
- I want ice cream!
00:33:34.880 --> 00:33:36.680
What do you mean
you're out of avocado toast?
00:33:36.682 --> 00:33:39.215
This barrel
makes me look fat.
00:33:39.217 --> 00:33:41.217
And here's our bottomless pit.
00:33:42.955 --> 00:33:45.188
Uh...
How do we get across?
00:33:45.190 --> 00:33:46.358
One moment.
00:33:59.671 --> 00:34:02.141
We call this surfing the web.
00:34:05.977 --> 00:34:07.580
Well!
00:34:08.247 --> 00:34:09.378
I'm scared.
00:34:09.380 --> 00:34:10.880
I'm so scared.
00:34:10.882 --> 00:34:13.818
Oh, my gosh.
00:34:13.820 --> 00:34:15.218
I'm scared
to close my eyes.
00:34:15.220 --> 00:34:16.320
I'm scared to open them.
00:34:36.842 --> 00:34:40.544
How do all those people fit
in that little contraption?
00:34:41.680 --> 00:34:44.782
My vanity mirror only
imprisons 14 souls at a time.
00:34:46.119 --> 00:34:47.454
Uh, you don't
have a cell phone?
00:34:48.188 --> 00:34:49.686
That's weird.
00:34:49.688 --> 00:34:52.122
I may not have a cell phone...
00:34:52.124 --> 00:34:54.124
Well, you don't
have a crossbow,
00:34:54.126 --> 00:34:55.928
and I thought
everybody had one of those.
00:34:58.131 --> 00:34:59.199
Mmm.
00:34:59.898 --> 00:35:01.231
My name is Wednesday.
00:35:01.233 --> 00:35:02.332
Okay.
00:35:02.334 --> 00:35:06.236
Uh, I'm Parker.
How long have you lived here?
00:35:06.238 --> 00:35:10.774
My whole life.
Which seems endless.
00:35:10.776 --> 00:35:12.608
I've never
seen you at school.
00:35:12.610 --> 00:35:13.945
I'm cage-schooled.
00:35:13.947 --> 00:35:15.945
- Excuse me?
- It's terribly dull,
00:35:15.947 --> 00:35:17.382
but my mother insists.
00:35:21.320 --> 00:35:23.754
I'm actually
cutting cage right now.
00:35:26.657 --> 00:35:27.925
Uh, okay.
00:35:27.927 --> 00:35:29.926
So, what happens
at your school?
00:35:29.928 --> 00:35:33.296
Uh, not much, just friends
turning on each other.
00:35:33.298 --> 00:35:35.999
Girls making other girls
feel bad about themselves.
00:35:36.001 --> 00:35:37.300
Typical junior high stuff.
00:35:37.302 --> 00:35:38.303
Intriguing.
00:35:41.673 --> 00:35:44.274
Can anyone go to your school?
00:35:44.276 --> 00:35:46.776
I guess so. But who'd want to?
00:35:46.778 --> 00:35:47.780
Wednesday!
00:35:48.581 --> 00:35:49.983
Great shot!
00:36:06.865 --> 00:36:10.466
Mr. and Mrs. Addams,
there's really not much to do
00:36:10.468 --> 00:36:12.269
to make this place perfect.
00:36:12.271 --> 00:36:15.604
All we have to do
is pull down the side walls,
00:36:15.606 --> 00:36:18.508
and then also break down
the other two walls.
00:36:19.678 --> 00:36:23.847
Open up the ceiling
by breaking it irreversibly.
00:36:23.849 --> 00:36:26.649
Just get this nasty little
floor out of the way,
00:36:26.651 --> 00:36:30.519
and there you go. With just
those little touches...
00:36:30.521 --> 00:36:32.789
Stop! Right there!
00:36:32.791 --> 00:36:34.658
Don't touch another thing!
00:36:34.660 --> 00:36:38.762
It's perfect.
Ms. Needler, you have a gift.
00:36:38.764 --> 00:36:41.631
The good news is I can have
a makeover crew up here
00:36:41.633 --> 00:36:43.800
and swinging hammers
first thing in the morning.
00:36:43.802 --> 00:36:44.803
What do you say?
00:36:45.671 --> 00:36:47.336
We thought you were finished.
00:36:47.338 --> 00:36:49.372
Our whole family
is coming in two weeks.
00:36:49.374 --> 00:36:50.740
Our finale!
00:36:50.742 --> 00:36:53.176
Our finale is in two weeks.
00:36:53.178 --> 00:36:54.745
Thank you, Glenn.
00:36:54.747 --> 00:36:56.680
It's a gracious offer,
Ms. Needler,
00:36:56.682 --> 00:36:58.082
but you really
have done enough.
00:36:58.084 --> 00:37:01.187
It's our son's Mazurka.
You understand.
00:37:01.553 --> 00:37:02.722
Thank you.
00:37:07.526 --> 00:37:08.992
Uh, we're missing Mitch.
00:37:08.994 --> 00:37:09.996
Where's Mitch?
00:37:10.762 --> 00:37:14.700
Get out!
00:37:15.767 --> 00:37:17.734
Mitch who?
00:37:20.039 --> 00:37:22.071
Gomez, I'll be blunt.
00:37:22.073 --> 00:37:25.242
I have 50 houses
to sell down there,
00:37:25.244 --> 00:37:30.713
and their view of your
property is, well, off-brand.
00:37:30.715 --> 00:37:33.917
- Fifty houses?
- Yes.
00:37:33.919 --> 00:37:35.619
You know,
ever since my family
00:37:35.621 --> 00:37:37.653
was chased out
from the old country,
00:37:37.655 --> 00:37:41.024
my one dream has been
00:37:40.059 --> 00:37:42.725
to find a place
we could call home.
00:37:42.727 --> 00:37:45.595
Once they see Assimilation,
00:37:45.597 --> 00:37:48.231
I think they'll
want to stay for good.
00:37:49.535 --> 00:37:53.403
Thank you so much
for coming by, Membrane.
00:37:53.405 --> 00:37:54.738
It's Margaux!
00:37:54.740 --> 00:37:57.106
Well then, run, Margaux!
00:37:57.108 --> 00:37:59.778
Run, run, run!
00:38:05.985 --> 00:38:08.718
That Wednesday girl
is a freak.
00:38:08.720 --> 00:38:12.088
We're about to be invaded
by a whole army of freaks.
00:38:12.090 --> 00:38:13.990
It's tragic when people
can't accept
00:38:13.992 --> 00:38:16.359
the help they so badly need.
00:38:16.361 --> 00:38:17.861
And when that happens,
00:38:17.863 --> 00:38:21.234
well, another kind of
intervention is called for.
00:38:22.934 --> 00:38:24.667
I agree, Gomez.
00:38:24.669 --> 00:38:27.504
The whole family moving here
would be a dream come true.
00:38:27.506 --> 00:38:29.740
But I don't trust
that Margaux woman.
00:38:29.742 --> 00:38:32.778
She's an eccentric, darling,
give her a chance.
00:38:33.579 --> 00:38:36.613
"Rasp-berry preserves."
00:38:36.615 --> 00:38:37.814
Mmm.
00:38:37.816 --> 00:38:40.816
Must be some kind
of scented embalming fluid.
00:38:42.787 --> 00:38:45.256
Wednesday,
practice your lurking
00:38:45.258 --> 00:38:47.258
on someone
other than your father.
00:38:47.260 --> 00:38:48.461
He's too easy.
00:38:50.595 --> 00:38:51.829
Much better.
00:38:51.831 --> 00:38:54.597
Mother, Father,
I'd like to speak with you.
00:38:54.599 --> 00:38:57.200
What's on your mind,
my little nightcrawler?
00:38:57.202 --> 00:38:58.936
I spoke with Parker
this afternoon.
00:38:58.938 --> 00:39:01.537
She's the daughter
of that talking mannequin
00:39:01.539 --> 00:39:02.872
who came by.
00:39:02.874 --> 00:39:04.707
She told me about
a communal school
00:39:04.709 --> 00:39:06.376
all the neighborhood children
attend.
00:39:06.378 --> 00:39:08.979
It's called "junior high."
00:39:08.981 --> 00:39:11.682
"Junior high"...
00:39:11.684 --> 00:39:14.184
Yes, yes,
I have read about those
00:39:14.186 --> 00:39:16.620
in my abnormal
psychology journals.
00:39:16.622 --> 00:39:18.521
Anyone of age can enroll.
00:39:18.523 --> 00:39:22.626
I think it would be
good for me.
00:39:22.628 --> 00:39:24.995
Well, I think
it's a capital idea.
00:39:24.997 --> 00:39:26.296
What of your studies here?
00:39:26.298 --> 00:39:29.131
Your taxidermy
is coming along so well.
00:39:29.133 --> 00:39:31.535
Mother,
would you really deprive me
00:39:31.537 --> 00:39:34.838
of the opportunity to torment
children my own age?
00:39:34.840 --> 00:39:37.307
Ah, she makes a point.
00:39:37.309 --> 00:39:39.341
What's more,
with Wednesday in school,
00:39:39.343 --> 00:39:42.014
we'd get to know
the people here even better.
00:39:42.414 --> 00:39:44.082
Well, Mother?
00:39:58.097 --> 00:40:00.332
Have a good day
at school, dear.
00:40:02.101 --> 00:40:03.403
Do your worst!
00:40:09.207 --> 00:40:13.412
Ah. Now I understand.
This is a children's prison.
00:40:16.215 --> 00:40:17.883
Who's that?
00:40:18.517 --> 00:40:20.052
Great.
00:40:21.352 --> 00:40:22.454
This is Wednesday.
00:40:22.787 --> 00:40:24.921
Hello.
00:40:24.923 --> 00:40:26.624
Hey, Parker.
00:40:28.026 --> 00:40:30.129
I got something for ya.
00:40:32.064 --> 00:40:33.896
A moldy sandwich?
00:40:33.898 --> 00:40:35.731
You're slipping, Bethany.
00:40:35.733 --> 00:40:37.566
You know what?
You're right.
00:40:37.568 --> 00:40:40.305
Let's kick it up a notch.
00:40:48.113 --> 00:40:50.381
You have no sense of humor!
00:40:51.584 --> 00:40:53.649
- Did you see her face?
- I know.
00:40:53.651 --> 00:40:54.653
Bethany, is it?
00:40:55.921 --> 00:41:00.256
Don't cut your eyes on my crew
unless you're ready to dance.
00:41:00.258 --> 00:41:04.162
What did you say,
little ghoul?
00:41:04.963 --> 00:41:07.396
I don't think you understand.
00:41:07.398 --> 00:41:10.600
I'm not locked up in here
with you, Bethany.
00:41:10.602 --> 00:41:14.803
You're locked up in here
with me.
00:41:18.642 --> 00:41:19.811
Whatever.
00:41:22.079 --> 00:41:23.613
What did you do?
00:41:23.615 --> 00:41:24.981
You shouldn't have said that.
00:41:24.983 --> 00:41:28.318
There's nothing you can do.
Bethany's way too popular.
00:41:28.320 --> 00:41:30.086
Popularity is fleeting.
00:41:30.088 --> 00:41:31.821
I prefer to set my sights
00:41:31.823 --> 00:41:34.291
on something
a little more challenging.
00:41:34.293 --> 00:41:35.959
Like what?
00:41:35.961 --> 00:41:38.264
The establishment.
00:41:54.345 --> 00:41:58.615
Let's see.
Who shall I be today?
00:41:58.617 --> 00:41:59.849
How about...
00:41:59.851 --> 00:42:02.486
Ah, Shelly Longbottom,
on Sugar Ridge Lane.
00:42:02.488 --> 00:42:05.457
From Shelly Longbottom
to everyone,
00:42:06.124 --> 00:42:08.291
"Did you hear
00:42:08.293 --> 00:42:11.695
"about those Addams people?"
Question mark.
00:42:11.697 --> 00:42:15.401
"Someone told me
they're wanted in 30 states."
00:42:18.537 --> 00:42:21.338
You know they're raising
a garden of man-eating plants?
00:42:21.340 --> 00:42:22.838
And feeding them our pets!
00:42:22.840 --> 00:42:24.874
Has anyone seen
my Shih Tzu Fee-fee?
00:42:24.876 --> 00:42:27.042
They're gonna turn us
all into zombies.
00:42:27.044 --> 00:42:28.678
Where are they from anyways?
00:42:28.680 --> 00:42:29.812
It doesn't matter!
00:42:29.814 --> 00:42:31.481
It's obvious
they don't belong here.
00:42:31.483 --> 00:42:34.517
Honey! Oh, those awful people
up on the hill.
00:42:34.519 --> 00:42:36.553
They're not even
on Neighborhood Peeps!
00:42:36.555 --> 00:42:38.088
Well, that's suspicious.
00:42:38.090 --> 00:42:39.988
If other people
are scared, then I'm scared.
00:42:39.990 --> 00:42:41.323
I believe
everything I read.
00:42:41.325 --> 00:42:42.992
If someone posted it,
00:42:42.994 --> 00:42:44.361
it must be true.
00:42:44.363 --> 00:42:45.595
You invite
one family in,
00:42:45.597 --> 00:42:46.696
then all the families come in.
00:42:46.698 --> 00:42:47.865
Do you think
we should investigate?
00:42:47.867 --> 00:42:48.932
I'm turning grey.
00:42:48.934 --> 00:42:50.566
I'm worried
for the children!
00:42:50.568 --> 00:42:52.237
We need
to talk to Margaux!
00:42:55.372 --> 00:42:57.407
Open your books. Page 43.
00:42:57.409 --> 00:42:59.274
Follow the instructions.
00:42:59.276 --> 00:43:01.410
- Yuck.
- Oh.
00:43:01.412 --> 00:43:03.546
I've done this
thousands of times.
00:43:07.887 --> 00:43:08.888
Huh?
00:43:19.432 --> 00:43:20.967
Flip the switch!
00:43:39.617 --> 00:43:43.288
Give my creature life!
00:43:49.628 --> 00:43:53.064
Live!
Live, I tell you, live!
00:44:11.316 --> 00:44:14.352
It's alive! It's alive!
00:44:32.436 --> 00:44:34.970
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! Get them off me!
00:44:43.481 --> 00:44:45.682
Zombie frogs!
00:44:45.684 --> 00:44:47.620
Bethany's changed her look.
00:44:48.019 --> 00:44:49.184
It suits her.
00:44:49.186 --> 00:44:51.720
Awesome. Totally awesome.
00:44:51.722 --> 00:44:53.122
It is an honor...
00:44:53.124 --> 00:44:54.291
...and a privilege...
00:44:54.293 --> 00:44:55.459
...to watch you work.
00:44:55.461 --> 00:44:58.062
Hey. Do you wanna
go to the mall?
00:44:58.064 --> 00:45:01.898
Why not? I haven't seen
a good mauling in ages.
00:45:23.153 --> 00:45:25.921
It's late. I'm worried.
00:45:25.923 --> 00:45:28.224
Darling,
Wednesday will be fine.
00:45:28.226 --> 00:45:29.725
She can take care of herself.
00:45:29.727 --> 00:45:32.028
It's not Wednesday
I'm worried about.
00:45:32.030 --> 00:45:35.231
It's the rest of them. We may
need to provide an alibi.
00:45:35.233 --> 00:45:37.700
My love, it's game night.
00:45:37.702 --> 00:45:38.901
Wednesday will be home soon,
00:45:38.903 --> 00:45:41.039
so why don't you
come and join us?
00:45:41.773 --> 00:45:44.874
Oh, very well. F-6.
00:45:44.876 --> 00:45:47.242
Pugsley,
you heard your mother.
00:45:47.244 --> 00:45:49.247
Blow F-6!
00:45:51.082 --> 00:45:52.515
Fire in the hole!
00:45:52.517 --> 00:45:54.517
I'm king of the world!
00:45:54.519 --> 00:45:57.720
Near, far, wherever...
00:46:05.229 --> 00:46:06.729
Yes!
00:46:06.731 --> 00:46:08.432
You sunk my battleship.
00:46:08.434 --> 00:46:10.736
Ha-ha! Well done, Pugsley!
00:46:19.644 --> 00:46:21.477
Hello, my uglies!
00:46:21.479 --> 00:46:25.148
Mother! I thought
I felt my skin crawling!
00:46:26.918 --> 00:46:28.885
Grandma, what a surprise.
00:46:28.887 --> 00:46:30.486
I thought you were in Prague.
00:46:30.488 --> 00:46:31.921
I was!
00:46:31.923 --> 00:46:34.423
They caught me smuggling
crocodiles out of the zoo.
00:46:34.425 --> 00:46:36.093
But I escaped
and talked my way
00:46:36.095 --> 00:46:37.894
onto a Somali pirate ship.
00:46:37.896 --> 00:46:39.495
We got into
a heated poker game
00:46:39.497 --> 00:46:41.832
and I cleaned them out.
00:46:41.834 --> 00:46:43.666
- Cheating or robbery?
- Both!
00:46:43.668 --> 00:46:45.468
Always remember, Pugsley,
00:46:45.470 --> 00:46:48.504
it ain't cheating
if no one catches you.
00:46:48.506 --> 00:46:50.941
I haven't bathed
in two weeks. Ugh.
00:46:50.943 --> 00:46:52.309
Or is it months?
00:46:52.311 --> 00:46:54.343
Ha! That reminds me.
00:46:54.345 --> 00:46:56.280
Guess what I've got, Pugsley?
00:46:56.282 --> 00:46:58.682
- Candy!
- Oh, yes!
00:46:58.684 --> 00:47:00.751
But the Mazurka
isn't for a week.
00:47:00.753 --> 00:47:02.417
Why are you here so early?
00:47:02.419 --> 00:47:05.122
Gomez said you needed
a little help with the party.
00:47:05.124 --> 00:47:08.191
And I said, I got my son ready
for his Mazurka,
00:47:08.193 --> 00:47:11.794
so of course, I'm going to do
the same for my grandson.
00:47:11.796 --> 00:47:13.129
I love him!
00:47:13.131 --> 00:47:15.131
It's true! I sent for her!
00:47:15.133 --> 00:47:16.899
I can't believe you bothered
00:47:16.901 --> 00:47:18.503
your mother with that,
darling.
00:47:19.003 --> 00:47:20.169
Neither can I?
00:47:20.171 --> 00:47:21.870
He said you were
in over your head.
00:47:21.872 --> 00:47:23.039
Thank you, Mother!
00:47:23.041 --> 00:47:25.374
Said you were more tense
than he's ever seen you.
00:47:25.376 --> 00:47:27.776
- I didn't say that exactly.
- Yes, you did.
00:47:27.778 --> 00:47:29.546
You said that exactly.
00:47:29.548 --> 00:47:30.680
Said he was worried
00:47:30.682 --> 00:47:33.149
you'd have a massive facial
expression and...
00:47:33.151 --> 00:47:35.050
You know, I'm starving!
Let's eat!
00:47:35.052 --> 00:47:37.854
Not until Wednesday gets home.
00:47:37.856 --> 00:47:40.356
Where is that
granddaughter of mine?
00:47:40.358 --> 00:47:42.160
I got something for her!
00:47:43.996 --> 00:47:46.562
Ah, there's my
little storm cloud!
00:47:46.564 --> 00:47:49.064
Wednesday,
where have you been?
00:47:49.066 --> 00:47:50.367
Elsewhere.
00:48:00.512 --> 00:48:02.211
What are you wearing?
00:48:02.213 --> 00:48:04.747
Parker calls it
a pop of color.
00:48:04.749 --> 00:48:06.349
While I certainly
appreciate a horse
00:48:06.351 --> 00:48:07.517
with a spear
through its head,
00:48:07.519 --> 00:48:08.584
the color is...
00:48:08.586 --> 00:48:10.586
She claims
it brings out my smile.
00:48:10.588 --> 00:48:12.988
Wednesday,
you don't have a smile.
00:48:12.990 --> 00:48:14.524
Turns out
I have a lot of things
00:48:14.526 --> 00:48:15.828
you don't know about.
00:48:19.865 --> 00:48:21.898
I see I got here just in time.
00:48:21.900 --> 00:48:23.633
You were right to call, Gomez.
00:48:23.635 --> 00:48:25.869
I'll talk to her.
Hand me that bear trap.
00:48:25.871 --> 00:48:29.275
Thank you, Grandma.
But I will handle this.
00:48:29.874 --> 00:48:31.276
Ah, suit yourself.
00:48:34.378 --> 00:48:37.814
When you're done with Fabio,
send him up to my room.
00:48:37.816 --> 00:48:40.052
- Ooh-hoo-hoo.
- Oh, boy!
00:48:42.688 --> 00:48:44.419
Wednesday.
00:48:44.421 --> 00:48:46.756
How would you like
to join me tomorrow
00:48:46.758 --> 00:48:51.294
after the school for tea
and séance in the cemetery?
00:48:51.296 --> 00:48:53.028
Is attendance mandatory?
00:48:53.030 --> 00:48:54.731
Come now, my little raven.
00:48:54.733 --> 00:48:57.200
You did so love it
when you were younger.
00:48:57.202 --> 00:48:58.570
If you like, Mother.
00:49:00.738 --> 00:49:02.439
Sleep well, dear.
00:49:02.441 --> 00:49:04.977
Don't forget to kick
your father good night.
00:49:10.314 --> 00:49:11.747
What's your
favorite filter?
00:49:11.749 --> 00:49:15.051
I don't know. I look black
and white in all of them.
00:49:15.053 --> 00:49:16.385
You know,
when I met you,
00:49:16.387 --> 00:49:18.120
I thought you were
super weird.
00:49:18.122 --> 00:49:19.921
But now,
I think you're really cool.
00:49:19.923 --> 00:49:21.157
I concur.
00:49:21.159 --> 00:49:23.325
You're not completely devoid
of merit yourself.
00:49:23.327 --> 00:49:25.430
I wanna say "thank you"...
00:49:27.898 --> 00:49:28.965
Oh, how'd that barrette
00:49:28.967 --> 00:49:30.399
you bought yesterday
go over at home?
00:49:30.401 --> 00:49:34.671
Actually, my mother's reaction
was, well, unexpected.
00:49:34.673 --> 00:49:38.307
She was accepting.
It depressed me.
00:49:38.309 --> 00:49:41.611
One never wants to see
one's mother that way.
00:49:41.613 --> 00:49:42.812
But I must admit,
00:49:42.814 --> 00:49:47.682
walking around in something
so garish, so grotesque...
00:49:47.684 --> 00:49:49.785
I was shocked
how thrilling it felt.
00:49:49.787 --> 00:49:52.354
I wish
I could do that.
00:49:52.356 --> 00:49:54.090
But my mom makes me
wear this stuff,
00:49:54.092 --> 00:49:56.093
and it's just so...
00:49:56.095 --> 00:50:00.296
I believe the word you're
looking for is "unfortunate."
00:50:00.298 --> 00:50:03.700
Ugh. I'd love to
just go crazy
00:50:03.702 --> 00:50:06.271
and wear something
that would shock her.
00:50:07.439 --> 00:50:08.671
Well, Parker,
00:50:08.673 --> 00:50:09.838
you're in luck.
00:50:09.840 --> 00:50:13.211
You happen to be talking
to the queen of shock.
00:50:34.298 --> 00:50:35.463
Hello, Mother.
00:50:35.465 --> 00:50:37.633
Where's my little wraith?
00:50:37.635 --> 00:50:39.568
Wednesday
still hasn't arrived.
00:50:39.570 --> 00:50:42.204
We agreed to come up here
for tea and séance,
00:50:42.206 --> 00:50:44.840
and now it seems
she stood me up.
00:50:44.842 --> 00:50:46.575
Morticia!
Can you hear me?
00:50:46.577 --> 00:50:47.977
You're not doing it right.
00:50:47.979 --> 00:50:49.312
- Press that button there.
- I did! I did!
00:50:49.314 --> 00:50:50.379
Did you hear it click?
00:50:50.381 --> 00:50:51.479
Morticia!
00:50:51.481 --> 00:50:52.615
It's supposed to be on
00:50:52.617 --> 00:50:54.017
- when you hear the click.
- Wait, I see something.
00:50:54.019 --> 00:50:55.718
- You did it!
- Hello, darling!
00:50:55.720 --> 00:50:57.486
Now, where's my granddaughter?
00:50:57.488 --> 00:50:58.921
Just what I said.
00:50:58.923 --> 00:51:01.057
I think she's distancing
herself from me.
00:51:01.059 --> 00:51:02.691
Oh,
she's wrapped in a black hole
00:51:02.693 --> 00:51:03.992
of emptiness and longing,
00:51:03.994 --> 00:51:05.528
like all of us Frump women.
00:51:05.530 --> 00:51:07.963
- Wednesday?
- It's not Wednesday!
00:51:07.965 --> 00:51:09.999
- Who's this?
- It's me, Father.
00:51:10.001 --> 00:51:11.066
Morticia?
00:51:11.068 --> 00:51:13.436
What's wrong with you now?
00:51:13.438 --> 00:51:15.537
The world can be so cruel.
00:51:15.539 --> 00:51:18.173
And all she wants to do
is run toward it.
00:51:18.175 --> 00:51:20.041
She's a lot like you that way.
00:51:20.043 --> 00:51:21.510
You wanted to see the world.
00:51:21.512 --> 00:51:23.680
Find yourself.
Serve time!
00:51:23.682 --> 00:51:26.615
Listen,
Morticia, remember the time
00:51:26.617 --> 00:51:29.619
you ran away
and joined the Girl Scouts?
00:51:29.621 --> 00:51:33.189
We were so worried
you were on a bad path.
00:51:33.191 --> 00:51:35.624
But when you found out
that campfires
00:51:35.626 --> 00:51:38.928
were for roasting marshmallows
and not other Girl Scouts,
00:51:38.930 --> 00:51:40.930
well, you got bored
and you came home.
00:51:40.932 --> 00:51:43.233
We were so relieved.
00:51:43.235 --> 00:51:44.700
Trust Wednesday.
00:51:44.702 --> 00:51:47.803
Like you,
she'll do the right thing.
00:51:47.805 --> 00:51:51.374
Thank you, Father.
That's most comforting.
00:51:51.376 --> 00:51:53.408
Good.
Wait a second.
00:51:53.410 --> 00:51:54.642
When did I die?
00:51:54.644 --> 00:51:56.146
20 years ago.
00:51:56.148 --> 00:51:58.914
Oh, right.
Happy anniversary, darling.
00:51:58.916 --> 00:52:02.551
All right, Pugsley, let's,
uh, go through it again.
00:52:02.553 --> 00:52:05.655
You got this, Pugsley.
This Mazurka's nothing.
00:52:07.492 --> 00:52:10.425
You eat swords for breakfast.
00:52:10.427 --> 00:52:13.095
You just got a case
of pre-ball jitters.
00:52:13.097 --> 00:52:15.263
It's way more common
than you think.
00:52:15.265 --> 00:52:17.834
If a Mazurka lasts
for more than four hours,
00:52:17.836 --> 00:52:19.438
contact your doctor.
00:52:20.805 --> 00:52:22.841
From the top.
Music!
00:52:37.655 --> 00:52:38.820
Pugsley,
00:52:38.822 --> 00:52:40.455
I can honestly say
00:52:40.457 --> 00:52:44.593
that was most definitely
a thing you did.
00:52:44.595 --> 00:52:47.863
A question,
what in heaven's name was it?
00:52:47.865 --> 00:52:49.265
The Sabre Mazurka.
00:52:51.702 --> 00:52:54.104
You know what?
You've been practicing hard.
00:52:54.106 --> 00:52:56.205
Why don't we
call it a day? Hmm?
00:52:56.207 --> 00:52:58.207
Hit the showers, kid.
00:52:58.209 --> 00:52:59.575
So, we're finished?
00:52:59.577 --> 00:53:00.843
Ah, yes.
00:53:00.845 --> 00:53:04.613
Yes, son. We are
most certainly finished.
00:53:04.615 --> 00:53:06.582
Mmm. Okay. Thanks, Pop.
00:53:06.584 --> 00:53:08.020
Thanks, Uncle Fester.
00:53:12.657 --> 00:53:16.693
This is a complete disaster!
How did this happen?
00:53:16.695 --> 00:53:18.193
And he's going
to make a fool of himself
00:53:18.195 --> 00:53:19.495
in front of everyone!
00:53:19.497 --> 00:53:21.530
Gomez, you gotta calm down!
00:53:21.532 --> 00:53:23.800
There's still a day
to get him ready!
00:53:23.802 --> 00:53:27.437
Fester, a year wouldn't be
enough to get him ready.
00:53:27.439 --> 00:53:29.506
I've failed him, Fester.
00:53:29.508 --> 00:53:34.142
I tried to raise him to be
an Addams, but I failed.
00:53:34.144 --> 00:53:36.914
They're going
to eat him alive.
00:53:38.916 --> 00:53:41.983
I like it like that
Ooh, baby
00:53:41.985 --> 00:53:44.019
I said I like it like that
00:53:44.021 --> 00:53:48.124
Ooh, baby,
I like it like that
00:53:48.126 --> 00:53:50.359
All right. Thank you.
00:53:50.361 --> 00:53:52.762
Grandma,
we already have a band.
00:53:52.764 --> 00:53:55.164
They came highly recommended
from the mortuary.
00:53:55.166 --> 00:53:56.465
Oh.
00:53:56.467 --> 00:53:58.501
I'm sure
they're good.
00:53:58.503 --> 00:54:01.370
My sister Sloom is
going to be judging Pugsley.
00:54:01.372 --> 00:54:03.273
And if things aren't done
the traditional way,
00:54:03.275 --> 00:54:04.840
she won't be happy,
00:54:04.842 --> 00:54:07.109
and the Mazurka
could be a disaster!
00:54:07.111 --> 00:54:09.113
But what do I know?
00:54:09.414 --> 00:54:10.546
Fine.
00:54:10.548 --> 00:54:11.948
Yay, we got the gig!
00:54:11.950 --> 00:54:13.048
We got it!
00:54:13.050 --> 00:54:14.550
Ah, one more thing...
00:54:14.552 --> 00:54:17.919
Oh, someone's at the door.
I'd better go see who it is.
00:54:24.896 --> 00:54:28.597
What's so great
about being yourself
00:54:28.599 --> 00:54:32.734
When you can be like
everyone else?
00:54:32.736 --> 00:54:35.271
Do not speak
to your mother that way.
00:54:35.273 --> 00:54:37.805
How dare you
enter this house like that.
00:54:37.807 --> 00:54:39.945
Wait, where are your tattoos?
00:54:42.380 --> 00:54:43.812
Oh, thank the stars!
00:54:43.814 --> 00:54:46.381
- Where were you?
- Hanging out with Parker.
00:54:46.383 --> 00:54:49.151
Is this why you skipped
tea and séance?
00:54:49.153 --> 00:54:51.153
Your grandparents
were trying to contact you.
00:54:51.155 --> 00:54:52.454
Holy Hades!
00:54:52.456 --> 00:54:54.057
Whoever did that to you,
Wednesday,
00:54:54.059 --> 00:54:56.425
I hope the other guy
looks worse.
00:54:56.427 --> 00:54:59.361
Nobody did this to me.
This is my new look.
00:54:59.363 --> 00:55:00.629
Do you like it?
00:55:00.631 --> 00:55:01.731
I do not like it.
00:55:01.733 --> 00:55:03.932
Everyone knows pink
is a gateway color.
00:55:03.934 --> 00:55:06.769
I warned you about sending her
to public school.
00:55:06.771 --> 00:55:07.836
Don't worry.
00:55:07.838 --> 00:55:09.570
Wednesday is never
going to that school again.
00:55:09.572 --> 00:55:10.905
- What?
- In fact,
00:55:10.907 --> 00:55:13.311
she's never leaving
this house again.
00:55:16.447 --> 00:55:19.515
Wow, that's some evil eye
she's got there.
00:55:19.517 --> 00:55:22.651
No, that dead-eye stare
is new.
00:55:22.653 --> 00:55:24.854
And I think I know
where she got it.
00:55:24.856 --> 00:55:27.590
Hey, guys, this is me now.
00:55:27.592 --> 00:55:30.593
If you like it, hit "like,"
but who cares if you like it.
00:55:30.595 --> 00:55:32.028
I'm living my truth.
00:55:32.030 --> 00:55:33.798
Parker?
00:55:35.298 --> 00:55:37.369
- Who did this to you?
- I did.
00:55:38.102 --> 00:55:40.102
This is my new look, Mother.
00:55:40.104 --> 00:55:44.673
I decided that from now on,
I choose my clothes, not you.
00:55:44.675 --> 00:55:48.077
Argh! This is that little
creep Wednesday Addams' work!
00:55:48.079 --> 00:55:51.347
She's not a creep.
She's just not like you.
00:55:51.349 --> 00:55:53.216
Why can't you ever let
people be different?
00:55:53.218 --> 00:55:57.486
Because it's my calling
to make everyone the same.
00:55:57.488 --> 00:56:01.390
Too bright!
It burns!
00:56:01.392 --> 00:56:04.292
Good! Maybe it'll burn away
the weird!
00:56:04.294 --> 00:56:05.494
I hate it here!
00:56:05.496 --> 00:56:07.495
Everything's boring
and fake and bright,
00:56:07.497 --> 00:56:09.231
like plastic flowers!
00:56:09.233 --> 00:56:10.466
Like you!
00:56:10.468 --> 00:56:14.504
Parker!
Plastic flowers live forever.
00:56:14.506 --> 00:56:16.808
Now, you go think
about that in your room.
00:56:17.407 --> 00:56:19.508
With no social media.
00:56:19.510 --> 00:56:21.977
No! Please, no.
Anything but that!
00:56:21.979 --> 00:56:24.646
Now go wipe that depressing
goop off your face.
00:56:24.648 --> 00:56:26.414
You first!
00:56:26.416 --> 00:56:30.553
Oh! Those Addamses
have gone too far this time.
00:56:30.555 --> 00:56:33.592
I think they're going to need
a little more help.
00:56:49.374 --> 00:56:50.542
Hey!
00:56:52.510 --> 00:56:54.376
Where are you going?
00:56:54.378 --> 00:56:55.945
A friend's.
00:56:55.947 --> 00:57:00.249
I hold people prisoner,
not the other way around.
00:57:00.251 --> 00:57:02.350
Good luck with your Mazurka.
00:57:02.352 --> 00:57:04.754
Wait, you're leaving?
00:57:04.756 --> 00:57:06.555
Who's gonna torment me
every day?
00:57:06.557 --> 00:57:09.758
Living under this roof is
all the torment you'll need.
00:57:09.760 --> 00:57:12.026
Besides, our parents
have made it clear
00:57:12.028 --> 00:57:14.796
that the only way
to be accepted in this family
00:57:14.798 --> 00:57:17.733
is to be exactly like them.
00:57:17.735 --> 00:57:20.102
I can't play
by those rules anymore.
00:57:20.104 --> 00:57:22.637
Farewell, brother Pugsley.
00:57:22.639 --> 00:57:24.542
Tomorrow, you become a man.
00:57:25.075 --> 00:57:27.311
And I become a fugitive.
00:57:28.979 --> 00:57:31.713
Always kinda knew
it'd end up like this.
00:57:31.715 --> 00:57:34.249
Just didn't think
it'd be so soon.
00:57:34.251 --> 00:57:36.718
I'll never
forget you, Pugsley!
00:57:36.720 --> 00:57:38.553
But I'll try.
00:57:38.555 --> 00:57:41.657
Pugsley, have you seen
your sister?
00:57:41.659 --> 00:57:43.258
She's not in her room.
00:57:43.260 --> 00:57:44.827
Mmm...
00:57:44.829 --> 00:57:47.164
Pugsley. Where's Wednesday?
00:57:47.731 --> 00:57:49.099
Um... Tsk.
00:57:50.834 --> 00:57:55.236
Tick, tock,
tick, tock, Mother.
00:57:55.238 --> 00:57:58.006
You're getting very sleepy.
00:57:58.008 --> 00:57:59.240
Pugsley...
00:57:59.242 --> 00:58:02.979
She did not go
to her friend's house.
00:58:02.981 --> 00:58:04.814
She went to
her friend's house?
00:58:04.816 --> 00:58:08.684
I repeat, she did not
go to her friend's...
00:58:35.046 --> 00:58:38.617
When the day is long
00:58:40.285 --> 00:58:42.220
And the night
00:58:42.887 --> 00:58:45.323
The night is yours alone
00:58:50.561 --> 00:58:51.959
When you're sure
00:58:51.961 --> 00:58:54.532
You've had enough
00:58:56.066 --> 00:58:58.235
Of this life
00:59:00.070 --> 00:59:02.140
Hang on
00:59:05.809 --> 00:59:09.514
Don't let yourself go
00:59:13.418 --> 00:59:17.088
'Cause everybody cries
00:59:21.191 --> 00:59:26.160
And everybody hurts
00:59:27.564 --> 00:59:29.532
Sometimes
00:59:29.534 --> 00:59:32.202
I shall be staying with you
for a while.
00:59:33.104 --> 00:59:36.942
Everybody hurts
00:59:41.111 --> 00:59:42.343
If this doesn't work,
00:59:42.345 --> 00:59:44.379
the next house we flip
is gonna land on you.
00:59:44.381 --> 00:59:45.580
Marty, listen to me.
00:59:45.582 --> 00:59:48.184
Tomorrow, our finale
will be the biggest half hour
00:59:48.186 --> 00:59:49.919
your network has ever aired.
00:59:49.921 --> 00:59:52.088
There's just one more thing
to take care of.
00:59:52.090 --> 00:59:53.555
This better be good
or you won't be able
00:59:53.557 --> 00:59:54.791
to get a job as a doormat.
00:59:54.793 --> 00:59:55.925
Yes, yes, yes.
00:59:55.927 --> 00:59:59.396
I intend to bring
the house down.
01:00:13.311 --> 01:00:14.977
When the pimp's in the crib ma
01:00:14.979 --> 01:00:17.546
Drop it like it's hot
Drop it like it's hot
01:00:17.548 --> 01:00:18.814
Drop it like it's hot
01:00:18.816 --> 01:00:20.283
When the pigs try
to get at you
01:00:20.285 --> 01:00:22.783
Park it like it's hot
Park it like it's hot
01:00:22.785 --> 01:00:23.952
Park it like it's hot
01:00:23.954 --> 01:00:25.421
And if a... get a attitude
01:00:25.423 --> 01:00:27.756
Pop it like it's hot
Pop it like it's hot
01:00:27.758 --> 01:00:28.890
Pop it like it's hot
01:00:28.892 --> 01:00:31.561
I got the Rolly on my arm
and I'm pouring Chandon
01:00:31.563 --> 01:00:34.633
And I roll the best...
'cause I got it going on
01:00:39.803 --> 01:00:43.738
You rang?
01:00:43.740 --> 01:00:46.207
It. Cousin. You made it!
01:00:47.343 --> 01:00:49.812
Please, come in.
Make yourself at home.
01:00:52.416 --> 01:00:53.950
Where did she hide my phone?
01:00:53.952 --> 01:00:55.450
I haven't been able
01:00:55.452 --> 01:00:57.820
to post a photo of my lunch
in almost three days!
01:00:57.822 --> 01:01:00.321
And what about in there?
01:01:00.323 --> 01:01:02.358
That's my mom's crafting room.
01:01:02.360 --> 01:01:04.660
No one is allowed in there.
01:01:04.662 --> 01:01:06.031
Then that's where it is.
01:01:13.671 --> 01:01:15.040
Weird.
01:01:28.052 --> 01:01:29.218
Whoa.
01:01:29.220 --> 01:01:30.885
Hidden depths.
01:01:30.887 --> 01:01:32.821
What is this?
01:01:32.823 --> 01:01:35.791
There's Mr. Haney
making a sandwich.
01:01:35.793 --> 01:01:38.526
And that guy trying to put
a tiny tuxedo on his cat.
01:01:38.528 --> 01:01:39.794
- Sit still!
- That's Mr. Flynn.
01:01:39.796 --> 01:01:40.863
Why are you
being so difficult?
01:01:40.865 --> 01:01:41.930
Trying to make you
01:01:41.932 --> 01:01:43.532
- look handsome.
- My money's on the cat.
01:01:43.534 --> 01:01:46.234
And there's our science
teacher, Ms. Gravely,
01:01:46.236 --> 01:01:49.238
putting her underwear
in the freezer?
01:01:49.240 --> 01:01:52.573
My mom must have built
hidden cameras
01:01:52.575 --> 01:01:54.475
into all of the houses.
01:01:54.477 --> 01:01:55.878
She really is psycho.
01:01:55.880 --> 01:01:57.015
- Parker!
- Whoa!
01:01:58.381 --> 01:02:00.247
Hey, Mom.
01:02:00.249 --> 01:02:02.651
We were just looking for you.
01:02:02.653 --> 01:02:06.724
What have I told you
about Mommy's crafting room?
01:02:08.425 --> 01:02:11.526
Sorry to do this,
but standards must be upheld.
01:02:11.528 --> 01:02:14.032
Parker, someday you'll
understand, and, Wednesday...
01:02:14.564 --> 01:02:15.833
Well, anyway, Parker.
01:02:19.570 --> 01:02:22.838
My mom
has a lair and a jail?
01:02:22.840 --> 01:02:25.173
I knew I should have picked
to live with my dad.
01:02:25.175 --> 01:02:27.541
We're gonna be on TV!
01:02:27.543 --> 01:02:28.711
Are we gonna be famous?
01:02:28.713 --> 01:02:30.079
Glenn, what do you
want in the frame?
01:02:30.081 --> 01:02:32.280
Okay, everyone, listen up.
01:02:32.282 --> 01:02:34.216
It's the last run-through
before the finale,
01:02:34.218 --> 01:02:36.419
so let's try this
one last time, okay?
01:02:36.421 --> 01:02:39.155
We're gonna shoot across
the town square to the gazebo
01:02:39.157 --> 01:02:40.888
where Margaux
will make her grand entrance.
01:02:40.890 --> 01:02:43.392
So everyone will be
walking this direction
01:02:43.394 --> 01:02:44.892
across the square.
01:02:44.894 --> 01:02:46.695
Judy, you start here,
01:02:46.697 --> 01:02:48.463
Ken, you're gonna follow Judy.
01:02:48.465 --> 01:02:51.133
You can stand right here
and...
01:02:51.135 --> 01:02:53.537
Uh, is there
a bathroom nearby?
01:02:54.037 --> 01:02:55.572
Uh...
01:02:58.742 --> 01:03:00.642
Margaux, they're here!
01:03:00.644 --> 01:03:02.245
What are you talking about?
01:03:02.247 --> 01:03:03.711
They're here!
01:03:03.713 --> 01:03:05.948
The Addams family!
01:03:16.126 --> 01:03:17.292
Pardon me.
01:03:18.930 --> 01:03:19.998
Excuse me.
01:03:20.664 --> 01:03:21.829
What are we gonna do?
01:03:21.831 --> 01:03:26.936
What we always do, Glenn.
Help people.
01:03:26.938 --> 01:03:30.104
"The Addams monsters
are planning
01:03:30.106 --> 01:03:33.975
"to attack the town tonight!"
Exclamation point.
01:03:35.146 --> 01:03:37.816
"Meet at Margaux's house now."
01:03:38.282 --> 01:03:39.984
Mmm? Oh.
01:03:45.590 --> 01:03:48.291
Salutations, Addams.
We're here!
01:03:48.293 --> 01:03:51.325
Petunia, I love what
you've done with your hair.
01:03:51.327 --> 01:03:54.028
Thanks, I just had it mowed.
01:03:54.030 --> 01:03:56.497
Please, come in.
Make yourself uncomfortable.
01:03:56.499 --> 01:03:58.800
Uncle Onion!
01:03:58.802 --> 01:04:00.202
- It's been so long!
- Voilà!
01:04:00.204 --> 01:04:02.437
Yes, so disappointed
to see you.
01:04:02.439 --> 01:04:05.807
Ah, you always manage
to bring a tear to my eye!
01:04:06.943 --> 01:04:09.678
Greetings, Dr. Flambe!
How you doing?
01:04:09.680 --> 01:04:11.814
- I'm on fire!
- Good!
01:04:11.816 --> 01:04:13.582
This party's gonna be lit!
01:04:13.584 --> 01:04:15.520
Ah, Auntie Sloom.
01:04:16.153 --> 01:04:18.452
Auntie Sloom!
01:04:18.454 --> 01:04:23.191
You are as radiant
as a barrel of nuclear waste.
01:04:23.193 --> 01:04:26.163
Where is the boy?
01:04:26.497 --> 01:04:27.562
Pugsley?
01:04:27.564 --> 01:04:29.530
Ah, there you are.
01:04:29.532 --> 01:04:30.832
Come down and say hello
01:04:30.834 --> 01:04:32.202
- to your Auntie Sloom.
- Ahh!
01:04:34.805 --> 01:04:39.508
Gomez, this tradition is not
to be taken lightly.
01:04:39.510 --> 01:04:42.676
I trust that the boy
has been properly trained.
01:04:42.678 --> 01:04:44.245
Yes, once you see how we've...
01:04:44.247 --> 01:04:48.883
It's bad enough this Mazurka
is taking place in New Jersey.
01:04:48.885 --> 01:04:52.021
Now, where are the dregs?
I'm thirsty.
01:04:52.023 --> 01:04:54.023
You've seen them!
01:04:54.025 --> 01:04:57.325
You've heard the stories
on Neighborhood Peeps!
01:04:57.327 --> 01:05:01.729
Those Addams aren't people,
they're monsters!
01:05:01.731 --> 01:05:04.901
And now, there's
an infestation of them!
01:05:04.903 --> 01:05:08.236
They're here to destroy
our beautiful community
01:05:08.238 --> 01:05:09.437
and turn it into a place
01:05:09.439 --> 01:05:11.907
that no Design Intervention
can save!
01:05:11.909 --> 01:05:14.410
Addams aren't wanted here!
01:05:14.412 --> 01:05:16.245
They're monsters!
They're all monsters!
01:05:16.247 --> 01:05:19.347
We need to destroy them first!
01:05:19.349 --> 01:05:21.251
Who's with me?
01:05:22.119 --> 01:05:23.584
We'll be revealing
Assimilation
01:05:23.586 --> 01:05:25.787
and all of you to our audience
in just an hour.
01:05:25.789 --> 01:05:29.224
Our last chance to help
these people is now.
01:05:29.226 --> 01:05:32.727
Bill, John, do you still have
that lovely catapult?
01:05:32.729 --> 01:05:34.195
Yes, we do!
01:05:34.197 --> 01:05:36.198
Are you sure about this?
01:05:36.200 --> 01:05:38.066
We can't let them ruin
our neighborhood!
01:05:38.068 --> 01:05:39.133
Let's do it!
01:05:39.135 --> 01:05:40.537
I want them out!
01:05:42.305 --> 01:05:45.506
No one torments
my family but me.
01:05:45.508 --> 01:05:46.811
Hair clip, please.
01:05:47.711 --> 01:05:48.947
Okay.
01:05:57.755 --> 01:06:00.590
Cage school 101.
01:06:02.093 --> 01:06:03.158
He'd better be ready
01:06:03.160 --> 01:06:04.559
or Auntie Sloom
will have his head!
01:06:04.561 --> 01:06:05.961
He looks very small.
01:06:05.963 --> 01:06:07.662
That kid's
got some big shoes to fill.
01:06:07.664 --> 01:06:09.465
I certainly
hope the boy's ready.
01:06:09.467 --> 01:06:11.999
Well, I'm not going
easy on him.
01:06:22.012 --> 01:06:23.111
Heads up.
01:06:24.648 --> 01:06:26.314
Hey, alto, you're flat.
01:06:32.155 --> 01:06:33.488
Sloom.
01:06:33.490 --> 01:06:35.925
- Sister.
- Darling, I...
01:06:35.927 --> 01:06:37.693
I know the last time
we saw each other,
01:06:37.695 --> 01:06:39.193
we had that horrible fight.
01:06:39.195 --> 01:06:42.564
And I just wanted to tell you,
from the bottom of my heart,
01:06:42.566 --> 01:06:45.466
I won that fight!
And I was glad I cheated!
01:06:45.468 --> 01:06:49.504
You won?
Still a sore loser, as always!
01:06:49.506 --> 01:06:52.274
I want a rematch!
Right here! Right now!
01:06:52.276 --> 01:06:54.809
Auntie Sloom?
Can I get you anything?
01:06:54.811 --> 01:06:56.178
When's the Mazurka?
01:06:56.180 --> 01:06:57.780
Soon, soon.
01:06:57.782 --> 01:06:59.615
Our daughter Wednesday
isn't here yet.
01:06:59.617 --> 01:07:02.383
If your daughter
can't be on time,
01:07:02.385 --> 01:07:04.688
then we will begin
without her!
01:07:05.322 --> 01:07:07.955
Very well, Auntie Sloom.
01:07:11.361 --> 01:07:14.798
Attention, please. Attention!
01:07:17.200 --> 01:07:20.135
The hour is upon us.
01:07:20.137 --> 01:07:21.238
Places!
01:07:34.985 --> 01:07:40.756
We gather today to witness
my son, Pugsley Addams,
01:07:40.758 --> 01:07:43.561
perform his Sabre Mazurka.
01:08:06.249 --> 01:08:09.852
He will begin with a reading
from the Terror,
01:08:09.854 --> 01:08:13.624
which commemorates
our cries in battle.
01:08:35.579 --> 01:08:39.483
And now,
the transition into manhood.
01:08:57.267 --> 01:09:00.101
And now, the Sabre Mazurka.
01:09:08.144 --> 01:09:09.446
Hold still.
01:09:11.482 --> 01:09:13.849
The Addams mustache.
01:09:13.851 --> 01:09:15.452
Now you're ready.
01:10:25.856 --> 01:10:26.924
Pugsley?
01:10:29.593 --> 01:10:31.193
I give up.
01:10:31.195 --> 01:10:33.030
I can't do it, Pop.
01:10:34.564 --> 01:10:35.765
Oh.
01:10:38.402 --> 01:10:39.570
I'm sorry.
01:10:40.504 --> 01:10:42.537
I let you down.
01:10:42.539 --> 01:10:45.509
You haven't
let me down, Pugsley.
01:10:46.744 --> 01:10:48.510
I let you down.
01:10:48.512 --> 01:10:50.212
I was so focused
on doing things
01:10:50.214 --> 01:10:52.012
the traditional way,
01:10:52.014 --> 01:10:54.151
I forgot to let you
be who you are.
01:10:58.588 --> 01:10:59.654
Hey!
01:10:59.656 --> 01:11:03.559
Are ya ready
for your Margaux makeover now?
01:11:03.561 --> 01:11:04.860
It's Margaux.
01:11:04.862 --> 01:11:06.227
She must have turned
the whole town
01:11:06.229 --> 01:11:07.863
into stark raving lunatics.
01:11:07.865 --> 01:11:10.265
Well, I have to admit,
I admire her work.
01:11:10.267 --> 01:11:11.400
Let's do this thing!
01:11:11.402 --> 01:11:13.235
It's locked and loaded,
Margaux.
01:11:13.237 --> 01:11:15.640
Let's go get 'em!
We've had enough!
01:11:16.205 --> 01:11:17.207
Fire!
01:11:22.144 --> 01:11:25.982
Get out!
01:11:32.455 --> 01:11:33.888
Pugsley!
01:11:33.890 --> 01:11:36.958
What is the true meaning
of the Mazurka?
01:11:36.960 --> 01:11:39.461
It's about protecting
our family
01:11:39.463 --> 01:11:41.663
from those who would
do us harm!
01:11:41.665 --> 01:11:45.069
Go ahead.
Show 'em what you're good at.
01:11:49.740 --> 01:11:53.809
All we have to do
is pull down the side walls!
01:11:53.811 --> 01:11:55.842
You shouldn't mess with me
01:11:55.844 --> 01:11:58.079
You don't wanna mess with me
01:11:58.081 --> 01:12:01.852
'Cause if you mess with me
You're messing with my family
01:12:05.022 --> 01:12:07.890
Everyone, follow my boy!
01:12:12.963 --> 01:12:14.130
Hey, guys!
01:12:31.147 --> 01:12:34.818
You might think
that we are all loco
01:12:39.322 --> 01:12:43.160
But this family
is about to go global
01:12:49.165 --> 01:12:50.633
Fire!
01:12:53.070 --> 01:12:55.305
Shakalaka bang, baby!
01:13:02.412 --> 01:13:04.245
Quick! Out this way!
01:13:08.885 --> 01:13:10.720
Pop, I'm out of ammo!
01:13:12.388 --> 01:13:13.989
We're trapped!
01:13:36.213 --> 01:13:38.012
Hope I'm not crashing
the party.
01:13:38.014 --> 01:13:39.114
Wednesday!
01:13:39.116 --> 01:13:40.414
Yeah!
01:13:40.416 --> 01:13:42.285
Ichabod, quick,
lower your branches!
01:13:45.054 --> 01:13:46.723
Everyone, grab on!
01:14:09.946 --> 01:14:15.016
Margaux Needler never stops
until the project is complete.
01:14:18.488 --> 01:14:19.823
Fire in the hole!
01:14:21.590 --> 01:14:23.091
Mazurka!
01:14:26.495 --> 01:14:27.928
Is everyone all right?
01:14:27.930 --> 01:14:30.601
No limbs missing that weren't
missing before you arrived?
01:14:36.673 --> 01:14:40.842
My little raven,
I'm so happy you returned.
01:14:40.844 --> 01:14:42.443
Of course I came back.
01:14:42.445 --> 01:14:43.511
I knew there was no way
01:14:43.513 --> 01:14:45.012
you were going
to save yourselves.
01:14:45.014 --> 01:14:47.449
You are like
weak baby squirrels.
01:15:00.531 --> 01:15:01.631
Socrates.
01:15:03.832 --> 01:15:06.437
Eight legs, nine lives.
01:15:08.804 --> 01:15:10.974
You were right,
cara mia.
01:15:11.842 --> 01:15:13.443
People can be cruel.
01:15:14.376 --> 01:15:15.776
What have we done?
01:15:15.778 --> 01:15:18.312
They're just a family.
01:15:18.314 --> 01:15:19.480
A family?
01:15:19.482 --> 01:15:21.615
Oh, please!
They're a bunch of monsters!
01:15:21.617 --> 01:15:24.052
Don't go soft on me, people.
01:15:24.054 --> 01:15:26.320
I will relish hounding you
01:15:26.322 --> 01:15:28.556
until that nuclear waste dump
of a house is gone
01:15:28.558 --> 01:15:31.391
and your mutant family
along with it! Ah!
01:15:31.393 --> 01:15:34.462
Be careful what you wish for,
Ms. Needler.
01:15:34.464 --> 01:15:38.369
My family and I will never run
from the likes of you again.
01:15:44.006 --> 01:15:45.974
Deep breath, Margaux.
01:15:45.976 --> 01:15:47.708
Okay, I have a finale
to shoot.
01:15:47.710 --> 01:15:49.343
Parker, let's go.
01:15:49.345 --> 01:15:51.578
I'm not going
anywhere with you.
01:15:51.580 --> 01:15:52.881
I'm staying with my friend.
01:15:52.883 --> 01:15:54.248
Your friend?
01:15:54.250 --> 01:15:56.184
Parker, these people
are freaks.
01:15:56.186 --> 01:15:58.185
If they're freaks,
then I'm a freak.
01:15:58.187 --> 01:16:00.221
And so are all of you.
01:16:00.223 --> 01:16:01.355
Exhibit A.
01:16:01.357 --> 01:16:05.092
Ms. Gravely, you put
your underwear in the freezer.
01:16:05.094 --> 01:16:07.095
Hey, it's refreshing, okay?
01:16:07.097 --> 01:16:09.263
Exhibit B.
Trudy Pickering.
01:16:09.265 --> 01:16:11.533
You sit on
the toilet backwards.
01:16:11.535 --> 01:16:14.101
Well, where else am I supposed
to put my arms?
01:16:14.103 --> 01:16:16.104
Wait, how did you know that?
01:16:16.106 --> 01:16:20.108
Because your houses have been
infested with Needler-Vision.
01:16:20.110 --> 01:16:22.843
She has hidden cameras
everywhere.
01:16:22.845 --> 01:16:23.912
What?
01:16:23.914 --> 01:16:26.580
And watches you
all of the time.
01:16:26.582 --> 01:16:27.681
In my private time?
01:16:27.683 --> 01:16:28.749
That is creepy, actually.
01:16:28.751 --> 01:16:31.351
- What else has she seen?
- That is over the line!
01:16:31.353 --> 01:16:32.520
Shut up!
01:16:32.522 --> 01:16:35.891
Listen, you lemmings!
This is my town.
01:16:35.893 --> 01:16:38.627
You are nothing
but a bunch of extras.
01:16:38.629 --> 01:16:42.363
We are going to march down
that hill and do a live show.
01:16:42.365 --> 01:16:44.032
I expect you to convince
01:16:44.034 --> 01:16:46.534
those brainless peons
out there in the audience
01:16:46.536 --> 01:16:49.069
that this is the perfect place
to buy a house,
01:16:49.071 --> 01:16:51.739
or none of you will be living
here much longer.
01:16:51.741 --> 01:16:53.408
- Do you hear me?
- Actually, Mom,
01:16:53.410 --> 01:16:55.142
everyone can hear you.
01:16:55.144 --> 01:16:57.311
You've been live
this whole time.
01:16:57.313 --> 01:17:00.782
Three million people
are watching you right now.
01:17:00.784 --> 01:17:02.784
The real you, for a change.
01:17:02.786 --> 01:17:05.319
Please, what do I care what
a bunch of bloggers think?
01:17:05.321 --> 01:17:06.421
Margaux?
01:17:06.423 --> 01:17:07.489
What?
01:17:07.491 --> 01:17:09.157
It's the network.
01:17:09.159 --> 01:17:11.292
They're taking your show
off the air.
01:17:11.294 --> 01:17:12.459
What?
01:17:12.461 --> 01:17:14.895
No. I'll be...
I'll be bankrupt.
01:17:14.897 --> 01:17:16.330
Who will buy all these houses?
01:17:16.332 --> 01:17:19.266
Okay, watch this.
Now's my chance.
01:17:19.268 --> 01:17:23.070
Excuse me,
I just tooted.
01:17:23.072 --> 01:17:25.073
Furthermore,
I think I can help you
01:17:25.075 --> 01:17:26.608
get rid of those houses.
01:17:26.610 --> 01:17:28.676
- What are you talking about?
- Well, my dear,
01:17:28.678 --> 01:17:31.578
you've got a bunch of houses
you need to get rid of,
01:17:31.580 --> 01:17:34.183
and I've got a bunch of family
I need to get rid of.
01:17:34.852 --> 01:17:36.316
Hello?
01:17:36.318 --> 01:17:39.087
Excuse me. I'm Trudy.
01:17:39.089 --> 01:17:43.158
Trudy Pickering. We...
We never officially met...
01:17:43.160 --> 01:17:45.592
Ah, yes. The toilet woman.
01:17:45.594 --> 01:17:46.793
Right.
01:17:46.795 --> 01:17:51.632
Listen, uh, please, give us
a chance to make it right.
01:17:51.634 --> 01:17:55.304
Let us have
our own design intervention.
01:17:56.305 --> 01:17:57.372
Mother,
01:17:57.374 --> 01:17:59.840
I spent time
with these people,
01:17:59.842 --> 01:18:03.810
and it is true, they are odd.
01:18:03.812 --> 01:18:05.512
But we shouldn't judge them
01:18:05.514 --> 01:18:07.516
just because
they're different.
01:18:30.307 --> 01:18:31.838
- Have a wonderful day!
- Whoo-hoo.
01:18:31.840 --> 01:18:32.907
And there you are.
01:18:32.909 --> 01:18:34.143
- Bye-bye.
- Thanks! Bye!
01:18:39.883 --> 01:18:41.516
Well, hello there!
01:18:41.518 --> 01:18:44.319
Howdy, neighbor.
How's the new house?
01:18:44.321 --> 01:18:48.021
Oh, I love it. I hope
you brought your umbrellas.
01:18:48.023 --> 01:18:51.859
Oh, you put in a typhoon.
What a great idea.
01:18:51.861 --> 01:18:53.761
Don't forget
the gift basket, silly.
01:18:53.763 --> 01:18:55.163
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:18:55.165 --> 01:18:57.565
We got scented
embalming fluid,
01:18:57.567 --> 01:19:00.334
toes, teeth, a fruitcake,
01:19:00.336 --> 01:19:03.038
rat bait,
got some dried apricots...
01:19:04.273 --> 01:19:07.208
He's like training a puppy,
adorable but tiresome.
01:19:07.210 --> 01:19:09.211
She's the woman of my dreams!
01:19:09.213 --> 01:19:11.878
Her breath is like
a baby's diaper.
01:19:11.880 --> 01:19:14.282
Fester, stop!
01:19:14.284 --> 01:19:17.752
Who would have thought
a guy like me, a total zero,
01:19:17.754 --> 01:19:21.021
would have ended up with you,
an also zero?
01:19:21.023 --> 01:19:22.959
Well, do come in!
01:19:25.795 --> 01:19:29.129
Now, with
the house rebuilt, Pugsley,
01:19:29.131 --> 01:19:33.402
we can throw you
the celebration you deserve!
01:19:34.237 --> 01:19:38.075
You are Addams
through and through.
01:19:55.924 --> 01:19:59.896
Get out!
01:20:00.897 --> 01:20:03.564
Oh, how lovely.
The spirit's home.
01:20:03.566 --> 01:20:06.769
Finally, back to normal.
01:20:12.808 --> 01:20:14.141
We did good.
01:20:14.143 --> 01:20:16.079
I won't tell anyone
if you don't.
01:20:37.433 --> 01:20:39.367
They're creepy
And they're kooky
01:20:39.369 --> 01:20:41.368
Mysterious and spooky
01:20:41.370 --> 01:20:43.370
They're altogether ooky
01:20:43.372 --> 01:20:44.842
The Addams family
01:20:45.441 --> 01:20:47.342
There house is a museum
01:20:47.344 --> 01:20:49.343
Where people come
to see 'em
01:20:49.345 --> 01:20:51.346
They really are a scream
01:20:51.348 --> 01:20:52.783
The Addams family
01:20:53.950 --> 01:20:54.952
Neat.
01:20:55.985 --> 01:20:56.987
Sweet.
01:20:59.856 --> 01:21:01.221
Petite.
01:21:01.223 --> 01:21:03.190
So get a witch's shawl on
01:21:03.192 --> 01:21:05.193
A broomstick
You can crawl on
01:21:05.195 --> 01:21:07.194
We're gonna pay a call on
01:21:07.196 --> 01:21:09.832
The Addams family
01:21:11.867 --> 01:21:13.300
Family, family
01:21:13.302 --> 01:21:15.336
I'd go to war for my family
01:21:15.338 --> 01:21:18.207
Ups and downs
Wrong or right, it's family
01:21:18.974 --> 01:21:20.041
They think that we crazy
01:21:20.043 --> 01:21:22.243
They say that we crazy,
can't handle it
01:21:22.245 --> 01:21:25.980
My back on the wall
Who I'mma call, my family
01:21:25.982 --> 01:21:29.450
We different, we stick out
Wig out, bug out
01:21:29.452 --> 01:21:31.218
Pop out, hop out
Go
01:21:31.220 --> 01:21:32.986
Ball out, hey
Show out
01:21:32.988 --> 01:21:34.221
A'ight, this a party
01:21:34.223 --> 01:21:36.556
Let's not make a problem
No!
01:21:36.558 --> 01:21:40.095
Why you looking at me like
there's something, tell me
01:21:40.097 --> 01:21:42.997
You should know it's not just
me that you'll be rubbing
01:21:42.999 --> 01:21:45.669
The wrong way,
so you better think twice
01:21:47.036 --> 01:21:50.404
You shouldn't mess with me
You don't want to mess with me
01:21:50.406 --> 01:21:53.874
'Cause if you mess with me
You're messing with my family
01:21:53.876 --> 01:21:55.275
You shouldn't mess with me
01:21:55.277 --> 01:21:56.610
You don't want to mess with me
01:21:56.612 --> 01:21:57.744
No!
01:21:57.746 --> 01:21:58.946
'Cause if you mess with me
01:21:58.948 --> 01:22:00.782
You're messing with my family
01:22:00.784 --> 01:22:04.084
Ay, ay, ay, ay
01:22:04.086 --> 01:22:07.523
You might think
that we are all loco
01:22:08.223 --> 01:22:09.891
Ay, ay, ay
01:22:09.893 --> 01:22:11.258
Don't mess
with my family
01:22:11.260 --> 01:22:14.261
But this family
about to go global
01:22:14.263 --> 01:22:15.431
We blowin' up!
01:22:17.700 --> 01:22:18.802
Yeah, yeah
01:22:19.568 --> 01:22:20.700
Yeah, yeah
01:22:35.585 --> 01:22:36.751
Don't mess with my family
01:22:36.753 --> 01:22:39.386
A'ight, this a party
Let's not make a problem
01:22:39.388 --> 01:22:40.587
No!
01:22:40.589 --> 01:22:43.123
Why you looking at me like
there's something, tell me
01:22:43.125 --> 01:22:46.260
You should know it's not just
me that you'll be rubbing
01:22:46.262 --> 01:22:47.427
The wrong way
01:22:47.429 --> 01:22:48.965
So you better think twice
01:22:50.500 --> 01:22:52.132
You shouldn't mess with me
01:22:52.134 --> 01:22:53.967
You don't wanna mess with me
01:22:53.969 --> 01:22:55.403
'Cause if you mess with me
01:22:55.405 --> 01:22:57.571
You're messing with my family
01:22:57.573 --> 01:22:59.106
You shouldn't mess with me
01:22:59.108 --> 01:23:01.108
You don't wanna mess with me
01:23:01.110 --> 01:23:04.481
'Cause if you mess with me,
you're messing with my family
01:23:07.015 --> 01:23:08.250
Yeah, yeah, yeah
01:23:09.486 --> 01:23:11.455
You're messing with my family
01:23:13.689 --> 01:23:15.491
- Yeah
- Yeah, yeah, yeah
01:23:17.027 --> 01:23:18.124
Don't mess
with my family
01:23:18.126 --> 01:23:19.193
No!
01:23:19.195 --> 01:23:21.695
Ay, ay, ay, ay
01:23:21.697 --> 01:23:22.864
You might think
01:23:22.866 --> 01:23:25.135
That we are all loco
01:23:25.934 --> 01:23:28.935
Ay, ay, ay
01:23:28.937 --> 01:23:30.104
But this family
01:23:30.106 --> 01:23:31.872
About to go global
01:23:32.974 --> 01:23:34.675
They say that we mean
Mean
01:23:34.677 --> 01:23:36.510
They say that we rude
Rude
01:23:36.512 --> 01:23:38.311
They say we got problems
Problems
01:23:38.313 --> 01:23:40.148
But we say it's cool
01:23:40.150 --> 01:23:41.515
Family, family
01:23:41.517 --> 01:23:43.717
I'd go to war for my family
01:23:43.719 --> 01:23:46.854
Ups and downs
Wrong or right, it's family
01:23:46.856 --> 01:23:50.158
Ay, ay, ay, ay
01:23:50.160 --> 01:23:52.526
You might think
that we are all loco
01:23:52.528 --> 01:23:54.194
Don't mess
with my family
01:23:54.196 --> 01:23:57.131
Ay, ay, ay,
01:23:57.133 --> 01:24:00.333
But this family
is about to go global
01:24:09.045 --> 01:24:10.310
There's no bell
01:24:10.312 --> 01:24:12.048
When you call for me
01:24:13.214 --> 01:24:17.316
You'll be falling for miles
01:24:17.318 --> 01:24:21.154
I'm bewitched by your misery
01:24:21.156 --> 01:24:25.693
But I love it when you smile
01:24:25.695 --> 01:24:28.598
Let me know
what you want from me
01:24:29.932 --> 01:24:33.601
Whisper "love" in my ears
01:24:33.603 --> 01:24:36.673
Before you try
to get your hooks in me
01:24:38.441 --> 01:24:42.575
I should warn you, my dear
01:24:42.577 --> 01:24:46.079
My heart is a haunted house
01:24:46.081 --> 01:24:50.284
Once you're in,
you ain't getting out
01:24:50.286 --> 01:24:54.120
It's the trap
you've been waiting for
01:24:54.122 --> 01:24:57.891
Ain't no windows,
ain't no doors
01:24:57.893 --> 01:25:01.031
No escaping the way you feel
01:25:02.464 --> 01:25:06.033
It's like a dream,
but you hope it's real
01:25:06.035 --> 01:25:08.638
My, my, my heart
01:25:09.772 --> 01:25:13.940
M-m-m-my heart is a haunted
01:25:13.942 --> 01:25:15.478
Haunted house
01:25:21.317 --> 01:25:25.285
Watch
yourself when you walk to me
01:25:25.287 --> 01:25:29.155
Careful where
your heart treads
01:25:29.157 --> 01:25:32.628
Suddenly,
you'll be in too deep
01:25:34.263 --> 01:25:37.765
You'll be caught up in my web
01:25:37.767 --> 01:25:40.137
You will think
of me constantly
01:25:41.637 --> 01:25:44.407
And it will drive you insane
01:25:45.474 --> 01:25:48.812
Like the tattoo
you can't remove
01:25:50.146 --> 01:25:54.648
Like the blood in your veins
01:25:54.650 --> 01:25:58.252
My heart is a haunted house
01:25:58.254 --> 01:26:02.422
Once you're in,
you ain't getting out
01:26:02.424 --> 01:26:06.360
It's the trap
you've been waiting for
01:26:06.362 --> 01:26:09.629
Ain't no windows,
ain't no doors
01:26:09.631 --> 01:26:12.768
There's no escaping
the way you feel
01:26:14.437 --> 01:26:18.105
It's like a dream,
but you hope it's real
01:26:18.107 --> 01:26:20.010
My, my, my heart
01:26:21.811 --> 01:26:27.550
- M-m-m-my heart is a haunted
- Haunted house
01:26:30.186 --> 01:26:33.421
Yeah
01:26:33.423 --> 01:26:36.726
- It's a haunted house
- Haunted house